If marriage isn’t annoying your spouse with your nonsense on a daily basis then I dont know what marriage is.
My wife is nearly annoy proof. If I texted that, she would get all warm and fuzzy.
Sounds like your wife is keeping the Live, Laugh, Love pillow manufacturers in business.
Have you tried removing the toilet seat 1 hour after your wife goes to bed, so that when she gets up to pee at 2am and doesn’t turn on the light, she falls in?
Then you burst in, snap a pic, and upload it to your instagram with the caption “I keep the bitches pussy wet!”
Maybe THAT will annoy her?
Texting my spouse in another country with random nonsense, even though with our data plan, it’s $0.10 a text.
Can’t you use something like Telegram/Signal/WhatsApp and avoid the charges?
Signal. Whatsapp maybe. But Telegram isn’t even encrypted e2e. Never Telegram.
“Go with the flow.”
Divorce noises.
Menstruation jokes aren’t funny. Period.
Imagine saying to your period:
“Be unstoppable!”
For maximum effect, save “walk like a champion!” until she’s rushing to the bathroom.