Apple industrial designers would totally buy it
And it’d require you to solve 20 captchas in order to use it.
Source: me, I tried to create a Twitter account.
my favorite feature is that it’s a smart device—you connect it with your phone via proprietary app and it tells you the temperature of your counter top. Also for a low monthly subscription fee it will also recite the screen play of a random episode of friends in 4 languages simultaneously, none of which are English, Spanish, Arabic, or Mandarin.
Love the proprietary app! I spent several months cobbling together a bunch of Docker containers that each apply a bundle of hacks I built through reverse engineering! Now I can control it via Home Assistant but I hope some guy that built one of the Docker images doesn’t disappear in six months when the manufacturer completely wrecks all our work with an API update!
Man I really hope that app requires an active internet connection and a registered account. And it would be real nice if the app wasn’t optimized at all and support would end after 3 updates.
Obviously the languages are Estonian, Finnish, Latvian and Lithuanian.
Except for the Finnish + Baltic region, where the languages are actually Tagalog, Swahili, Navajo and the most popular option, x86 assembly for outputting the text of the episode in Haitian Creole. The latter is the most popular because of how insanely fast they have to speak.
Personally, I’m a fan of the rumble notification feature. Pair it with your phone and it’ll rumble in response to a random notification on your phone at least once a day. Best part is: it kinda shakes the whole house and will sometimes shuffle itself into the floor so you can’t ignore it! Yeah, I’ve had to replace some tile, but it’s totally worth it.
Oh my god do they make it in that 60s sage color?
Will buy it if it’s made of galvanized square steel
Reminds me of the reployer from Prey. Every office has one of these machines but seemingly no one knows what they actually do - not even engineers.