yes, because putting yourself out there just gets you yanked around by assholes – ask me how I know.
Either Mr. Right will fall out of the great blue sky directly into my lap, or I’ll die alone. But I frankly no longer have the will to really put effort towards that, anymore; and I can’t fathom criticizing anyone else for deciding the same. Hell truly is other people.
not having a single person express genuine attraction and interest in me, in my life + the one time I thought I had that interest, after a few months, they dumped me on Christmas morning via text and said they essentially meant nothing of what they said before. Every single person before or since has either forgotten I exist or ghosted me outright within days or weeks of starting talking to them, even when they initiate. I suppose the novelty just wears off. Couple other highlights include the guy who used me as his therapist for a couple months until he forgot I existed when he got on antidepressants, and the guy who was over-the-top affectionate for weeks until apparently a switch flipped in his head and he became distant and quiet until ghosting me. And many more that I won’t bore you with.
been slamming my head against that wall for 7+ years with absolutely no success, and I chose to stop trying for my own sanity. Sometimes you have to accept that some of the things you want out of life, are either simply not yours to have, or not in your control to obtain – it’s that or I keep raking myself over the coals trying to figure out what I don’t have that others want, and I’ve done that for long enough.
and my story is just one of many, many people experiencing the hell that is other people.
As a textbook people-pleaser, yeah it’s exhausting being the fun new toy until i realize they are using me as a bang-maid…
You don’t have to do it for everything. There’s lots of lower risk, rewarding activities than trying to find someone decent to date. I’m way less depressed since I got over the idea that I needed to be in a relationship to be happy. I have friends I hang out with. I have hobbies that interest me. Sure I’d like to have sex more but being in a relationship is no guarantee of that either.
Ouch this one hurt, that’s so fucking true 😔😔
The main issue for a lot of people is a lack of good third places.
Combine less and less free time outside of work, with higher nationwide costs affecting access to third places that you would otherwise congregate with people in, (i.e. cafes, bars, clubs, etc) and you get people who, while probably somewhat outgoing, are unable to actually be outgoing, since there’s not a good place to express that in.
I am in this picture and I don’t like it.
That post’s gotta chill with the personal attacks, geez.
