We’ll just all assume that every person who gets this would make themselves early twenties with flawless skin, perfect organs, appendages and functionality, and no excess weight.

My question is, would you change yourself from your genetic baseline, and if so, how?

84 points

I’m trans so yes, I’ve been trying to do that for over a decade

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12 points
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77 points

I’d get a new bum. Mine’s cracked.

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27 points

That’s nothing, mine has a hole that goes all the way through!

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39 points

If you really think about it, people are just donuts with anxiety

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Hold on, just a thought. If a straw only has one hole because it goes all the way through, then anus and mouth are both the same hole.

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10 points

We are NOT having the “how many holes does a straw have?” arguement again!

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4 points

You could become the unibummer.

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2 points

MEND BUTTCRACK

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52 points

Do I have to have a biological body? I don’t want to be carbon based anymore.

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21 points

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel.

-MisterNeon

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2 points

That quote gets thrown around at me alot. Which is weird since I paint Orks.

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9 points

I mean I’ve heard that arsenic-based life forms are plausible but I think you have to live in a methane Rich environment to survive so you would basically like collapse into a puddle of toxic goo

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12 points

I was hoping for something more mechanical or digital. If I’m going through all the hassle of getting a new body then I don’t want to bother with the habits of the old one ( eating, sleeping, etc).

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8 points

So basically just like turn you into Data.

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6 points

TIL Alex Mack probably smelled like a fart.

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4 points

Good news! You are now water based! Nothing changed, enjoy your wish!

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3 points

Awww c’mon this ain’t monkey paw.

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39 points

I would absolutely:

  • Get rid of anxiety (assuming there’s some genetic component to this - seems like all the women in my family have it)
  • Change my eye color from hazel (mixed green & brown) to full green
  • Add about 5 inches of height (I’m only 5’0")
  • Add gills to my sides that deploy at will when under water, but otherwise are hidden
  • Fix that annoying “it went down the wrong pipe” design flaw
  • Add a nictitating membrane to help fix my dry eyes
  • Wings? Maybe!
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6 points

Definitely wings. First thing I thought of. Unfortunately that would require a massive redesign. Firstly, you’d need hollow bones, as well as a very low body fat percentage. Decent chance boobs and butt don’t grow hardly at all. Secondly, you’d need extremely strong chest muscles, which also still have to be light. And in order to provide enough energy for that, you’d need a larger and stronger heart with wider blood vessels. You’d also need to most likely quintuple your daily calorie intake. Possibly more depending on how often/when/ where you are flying. You would also want lungs with more surface area to absorb oxygen better, even at low altitudes. Especially at higher altitudes. That would likely mean a stronger diaphram. Stronger leg muscles for takeoff/landing. Better eyes for scoping out landing points and avoiding hazards. Most birds don’t fly at night, so you may consider something akin to a cats eyes, or go the bat route with echolocation. And you’re going to need a neutral remapping unless you just plan to replace your arms with the wings. Fortunately, outside of a higher energy cost, that last one might happen automatically, our brains are very plastic.

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4 points

Congratulations, you’re a Harpy

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2 points

What a thorough breakdown haha

Hmm… hollow bones might negate the need for gills.

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36 points

I’d completely change everything and end up being a perpetually horny sex doll

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9 points

Mood

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