Moses : The Lord, the Lord Jehovah has given unto you these fifteen…
[drops one of the tablets]
Moses : Oy! Ten! Ten commandments for all to obey
What’s funny is that (according to the old testament) when Moses came down off the mountain with the tablets and found everyone worshipping the golden calf, he had a big hissy fit and smashed them. So then after doing quite a bit of murdering he had to go back up the mountain to get a second set. Exodus 32-34
I asked a religious relative how it was ok for Moses to murder people when he had only just be told by God himself “thou shalt not kill”, and she said it was because the don’t kill thing came further down the list than having only the one god.
As a note, the Israelites would in later generations go on to kill a shitload of people. It’s one of those things where it seems like the Bible only really considers it murder if God doesn’t sanction it. It’s honestly one of the many sticking points that makes Abrahamic religions a hard sell for modern individuals. That said, if you look at it from a historical perspective, it really comes across more like a religious version of the Code of Hammurabi. It’s less “don’t kill” as a philosophical or religious position and more about sanctions against killing in a practical legal sense. A functioning society has laws that formally govern behavior and the Israelites were essentially an ecclesiarchy, with Moses being both head of state and high priest. The same laws that governed social life were always going to intersect with laws that governed spiritual life.
The bible seems to consider it murder only if it’s another christian.
[if someone] has gone and served other gods and worshiped them, […] you shall stone that man or woman to death with stones.
-Deuteronomy 17:2-5
If your brother, the son of your mother, or your son or your daughter or the wife you embrace or your friend who is as your own soul entices you secretly, saying, ‘Let us go and serve other gods,’ […] you shall kill him. Your hand shall be first against him to put him to death.
-Deuteronomy 13:6-10
you shall stone that man or woman to death with stones
Pretty specific - I guess that closes the “get them high” loophole.
I love this because what if actually? What if there’s literally a buzzfeed tier list of five things to do we’re missing for a utopian society? And mankind fucked it like we always do.
Louisiana: basic literacy is not their strong suit.
suit but agreed. Edumacation was never one of the original thirteen commandiments.
*numeracy is the word you’re looking for.
you’re not wrong though, literacy is also not their strong suit :)
In Louisiana, they think numeracy is what gets you run outta town or burned alive, and they’re not entirely wrong there either, historically speaking.
That comma could have been anything else and it would been a valid sentence.
I mean originally there were 15.
My favorite joke from that movie.
I can’t remember if it’s the same movie, but the scene where Moses gets mugged is also a highlight for me.
I read that as commandlets and now I’m worried Powershell has given me brain damage…
- if ((Get-God).Count -gt 1){Set-God -Identity “YHWH”}
- Get-Idol | Remove-Idol
- foreach($godsname in ((Get-God).Name){ if (($speech -like “$godsname”) -and ($speech.vain)) {$speech = “”}}
- Set-Reminder -Start (Get-Date “06/29/2024”) -Reoccurance 7 -Subject “Holy”
- Set-Person -Relation “Mother” -Honor $true; Set-Person -Relation “Father” -Honor $true;
- $murder = $false
- $adultry = $false
- $stealing = $false
- if ((Get-Truth $speech) -eq $false){$speech = “”}
- $NoCovet=(Get-Property -SearchDepth 2) + (Get-Person -Relation “Neighbor”)
I very quickly checked wikipedia, because I couldn’t easily identify the extra one. It lists all 16 of the 10 commandments… The table looks like different branches of christianity bundle some of them together (mostly various coveting) or don’t even consider the first and last a commandment, so they always only count to ten. So it’s an easy mistake to make.
But the fact that they couldn’t even count the paragraphs is riddiculous.
Seems like the sort of thing people should know about a central tenet of a pillar of their identity…
More importantly, they’d have to stop the most sacred of Christian traditions: throwing a pigskin around while assaulting each other.
Not a good look when something as solid as the ten commandments doesn’t line up between groups with similar beliefs.
Might make some folks want to look under the hood. That certainly won’t increase church attendance.
