95 points

Should’ve been Jupiter instead of the moon. Since Jupiter protects the inner solar system from most asteroids and comets.

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70 points

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43 points

Nah. Jupiter would be like “Yummy! Moar!!!”

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25 points

agree, would make more sense a comet asking Neptune for directions, and then colliding with Jupiter with Pac-Man face

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2 points
*

It’s way more complicated than that:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zu41rrc_Ng

The way the complicated orbital mechanics work, there is a “gate” which is the only place where asteroids/comets/whatever can cross Jupiter’s orbit. This doesn’t usually result in them hitting Jupiter, but it does limit their options for hitting Earth.

Been a while since I watched the video, so I don’t remember all the details, but that should be the basic gist.

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2 points

Jupiter is “the big one”.

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2 points

In the bando of the Solar System, Jupiter is the pitbull

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25 points

The moon doesn’t actually protect the Earth from asteroids. It’s a net-zero because the extra mass attracts more asteroids.

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61 points

Your mom’s extra mass attracts more asteroids.

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11 points

How did you kn… uh I mean, nuh-uh!

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2 points

Ok, I’m old. Asteroid is slang for what?

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3 points

I don’t think it’s common slang but in this particular case asteroid is the penis

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4 points

It’s not really about “attracting” asteroids, it’s more about their orbital trajectory happening to intersect the Earth’s at the right time. I think the Moon’s gravity is about as likely to redirect an asteroid towards the Earth as it is away, but the Moon also physically intercepts some asteroids, so the net effect would be a slight decrease in Earthly asteroid impacts.

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14 points

Now we still have to go to work tomorrow!

FUCK YOU Moon 🖕

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8 points

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7 points

… and that’s how life on mars got extinct

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7 points

🌎❤️🌕

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