On Friday, New York Police Commissioner Jessica Tisch told media that authorities now believe the suspect accused of shooting and killing UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson is no longer in New York City, and promptly fled on a bus after the murder.

248 points

Man what a responsible individual. E-bike rentals, mass transit, killing parasitic CEOā€™s, this guy seems to be fairly eco-friendly.

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He didnā€™t compost the body though. šŸ˜”

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60 points

He did the best he could with the constraints he had.

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25 points

He canā€™t do everything. We all must pitch in to help eat the elephant.

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5 points

What would happen if we all went tinkle on his grave? Would that help composting?

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22 points

I think we can forgive such a minor transgression.

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1 point
Deleted by creator
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90 points

I heard theyā€™re hiding out in a billionaireā€™s house. The police better raid and thoroughly search all of those.

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87 points

Good. I hope heā€™s since gotten on a plane and is chilling on a beach in a non-extradition country right now.

The Adjuster. True American Hero.

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69 points

Heā€™s probably sailing so his carbon footprint stays low.

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4 points

Sailing would keep his emissions low but a sailboat has a giant footprint

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9 points

Unless he made the sailboat himself out of recycled materials!

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2 points
*

Compared to a jumbo jet?

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1 point

Maybe he should sail the boat on the water instead of wearing it on his feet like shoes

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73 points

Thatā€™s not what I heard, pretty sure heā€™s still in NYC.

Unless he is, in which case he definitely fled the country.

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23 points

Itā€™s mostly the police saying they spotted a man who fit the description enter a bus station and not be seen leaving it. Heā€™s probably going to a variety of US based places at the moment, but he should leave the county ASAP in case DNA points to the actual suspect and he gets put on a no fly list. P

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30 points
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DNA only helps if heā€™s already in the system for some reason, like a previous crime. Or I suppose if heā€™s ever used one of those DNA ancestry things. I bet the police have access to that, whether theyā€™re supposed to or not.

And for a no fly list, they need to know who it is first. If they knew that, weā€™d probably know as well since theyā€™re clearly trying to cast the net as wide as possible.

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39 points

DNA only helps if heā€™s already in the system for some reason

Noooopeā€¦

He simply needs some family that contributed to 23andMe or similar, to narrow it down.

Thatā€™s enough for a Judge to force them to hand over a DNA sample for comparison.

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5 points

Pretty sure they have everyoneā€™s DNA by now, between all the ancestry databases and the like.

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10 points

That assumes they were able to collect DNA from the scene. Which is a public street in the largest city in the country.

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7 points

I heard heā€™s hanging out the mole men in the sewers. The cops better check every pipe.

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69 points

fled

Pretty sure he just kinda left. Probably couldā€™ve been high-fiving people on the way out.

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25 points
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Now I want to see The Adjuster, the musical, escape scene

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