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7 points

Could it be that you’re a straight white male who doesn’t mix with people outside that particular bubble much? I’m one of those, and I’m willing to believe others when they say it happens, and how often. Even in those places where the majority vote for the more progressive candidate.

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3 points
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The liberals do it almost more than the conservatives. It’s more open racism and avoidance in red areas but somehow it’s a kindness to talk down to people of color in the eyes of the liberal.

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2 points

I’m a man and I’ve never been catcalled, but I can believe women who overwhelmingly say it’s a common experience.

A non-black person saying they’ve never been followed around a convenience store, or dealt with adultification (the phenomenon where racial bias leads people to treat black children more as adults, including things like the first row in this comic assuming a young black woman is holding her own daughter).

We all live our own experiences, so trying to deny that something happens based on not having experienced it yourself is just being obtuse.

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6 points
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-75 points

Last question is pretty legit though. Isn’t there data of how many black kids grow up without a father?

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29 points

Plenty of white guys that ditched, divorced, etc their partners after getting them pregnant as well.

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-24 points

Nice whataboutism. Not saying anything about the reason, but you automatically go for the “the others do it too.” I just question the honesty of the postulation in the meme. Since the father is more often than not in the picture, as is evidenced by data collected and more often than not an argument for why black men fall into crime more often than others, it is a valid question. Dont know why a doctor would ask such a question though. Seems fake.

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9 points

Black men fall into crime more? I’d love to see a study on that. They get incarcerated at a higher percentage, it’s not the same as actual crime rate.

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6 points

If you have no data about the “fact” (I wish I could highlight even more how much that is NOT a fact) and are asking users to provide evidence that supports that to you, maybe the question is not legit then, is it?

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-16 points

Its a rhetorical question for you to see the flaw in the picture painted by the “meme” https://centerforhealthjournalism.org/our-work/reporting/impact-absent-fathers-mental-health-black-boys

Look at the graphs for single motherhood https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/00027162221120759

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10 points
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Its a rhetorical question

No, it wasn’t. It wasn’t rhetorical. You were being racist and biased in your question and now trying to hide behind rhetorics. You think you’re the first person with bias I’ve seen who’s trying to “I was joking!” his way out of their bigotry? Lol

for you to see the flaw in the picture painted by the “meme”

There is no “flaw” in the comic. It’s showing the VERY REAL difference in treatment among white and black people

Look at the graphs for single motherhood

Maybe you should actually read the article before asking me to look only at a specific portion of the whole story. Especially since, at the very beginning, the author herself wrote

But a growing literature is demonstrating how the impact of single parenthood and family structure on children varies by racial group, including evidence that Black children experience smaller single motherhood “penalties” for some outcomes, like education.

So, once again, your comment was poorly thought out. The article you yourself shared, was exploring HOW they differ and it even talked about possible socioeconomic reasons for why there are differences. What it didn’t do, is carrying out a census to show if indeed black men are more likely to leave their families.

And now, please stop trying to wiggle your way out of your bigoted comment. I don’t care about such sad attempts. Bye

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23 points

It is more common for black fathers to be absent according to certain demographic measures.
However: race is not the only factor to the statistic, and the statistic in not defined well through time.
At one point “divorced or never married mother” was the basis for the statistic. Shifting it to “father lives in a separate home” is better but still misses that you can live in a separate home and still be there for your kid. That’s before you get to adoptive fathers and all the other non-biological support roles.

For all those measures, economics is a better predictor than race. Race serving as an indirect measure of economics is its own can of worms and bias.

Finally, a question can be statistically valid and still be biased, inappropriate, or just rude.
“You’re black, so I don’t want to assume your child’s father is around” is all of those.

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1 point
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24 points

The fact that you “know it’s a talking point” but don’t know the statistics makes me feel that you should re-think who created the statistics in the first place and why.

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-8 points

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/00027162221120759

Data for this study comes from the LIS, which is an archive of cross-nationally and historically harmonized individual-level nationally representative datasets. U.S. data in the LIS come from the Annual Social and Economic March Supplement of the CPS. The main advantage of using the LIS over the underly- ing CPS is the higher-quality and improved income measures that comprehen- sively incorporate taxes and transfers and therefore yield improved poverty measures. I analyze twenty-five waves of LIS data for the United States from 1995 to 2018. I select this time period because it includes all the U.S. datasets for which all variables in the study are available.1

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9 points

Lmfao, from your article:

it seems more research exploring the role of structural forces (e.g., the labor market, policies, racism, etc.) would be a fruitful avenue for advancing our understanding of the enduring racial inequality in child poverty and the penalties attached to child poverty risks.

Even your article calls out that racism is a major factor that should be studied. Glad you agree.

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26 points

Lol that’s a stereotype. One parent not being in the picture is a poverty thing. Not a black thing. Since poverty disproportionately effects black Americans out seems like it’s a black problem but it’s a system of oppression problem.

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-15 points
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Look at the graphs and compare the relative Poverty between latinos as blacks. Then looks at the graphs showing single mothers. There is some correlation between poverty and single motherhood, clearly. But there is definitely a great disparity between the various poor that you just can’t wave off as “racism”. It might be systematic, but not only a system perpetrated by the white majority, cause then the graphs would be equal for latonis and blacks. So perhaps there is a systemic issue within the black community causing men to not take responsibility for their own children? https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/00027162221120759

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7 points

Lol this doesn’t give any context and has cherry picked data with poor controls over variables. (Like why is a parent missing? Is it due to over incarceration and policing of black communities? Is it due to poor financial state of schools in black communities? What classifies a single mother? Does that mean the father is not in the child’s life at all or just not currently in a relationship with the mother? What about single father’s? Is that accounted for?)

There’s nothing in the black community or genetics. It’s all outside societal pressures. There are hundreds of studies on this by way more reputable sources with vastly different conclusions. The black community is no different when it comes to wanting to have a family and wanting to be involved with that family. But Black Americans ( especially black women) deal with outside factors that essentially guarantees most black Americans are second class citizens.

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14 points

Not everyone believes this, but my understanding is that declassified (CIA I think? been a while) documents support the assertion that parts of our government employed a strategy designed to disrupt black communities. This strategy involved flooding predominantly black neighborhoods with crack cocaine, and then letting addiction, crime, and incarceration take their course.

It worked really well.

And then add in policies over the years that have perversely incentivized splitting up households (much-needed aid not available depending on who lives in the home), too, which may have been well-intentioned but proved very damaging to communities.

And we should also not forget - when comparing poverty outcomes between black and Latino Americans - these groups did not start from equivalent points. The practice of slavery did lasting, massive damage to the black community in the US - it’s basically impossible to extract present outcomes from that history. Far too much trauma.

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26 points
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And you’d likely still find that out using the same question from the left.

Also just some warning that there is immense racial bias in a lot of data. Take what you’ve heard with a grain of salt.

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62 points

Here’s a bonus I saw at college: “Can I touch your hair?” it’s an especially weird one.

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43 points

white guy here.

I had a lady do that to me and my beard in college.

it was weird at the time but scratched a physical contact itch I had no idea I had. the interaction started a long lasting infatuation with black matriarchs.

my point is, it’s fine to tell people no because it’s a limit of yours, but some people get curious about things that are new(to them) and it shouldn’t be held against them. who knows you might even like it.

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38 points

The problem is volume. You had one interaction years ago. Black ladies get this sort of thing a lot more. I’m sure it gets exhausting.

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38 points
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61 points
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I was blonde growing up in a middle eastern country and people used to want to touch my hair all the time. It’s just curiosity.

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20 points

No, it can only be white on black racism

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12 points

That’s funny, because I had a lady I work with tell me to feel her hair.

We were talking about how she always had different hairstyles, and then she explained all this stuff about weaves and fake hair, and then she had me feel her hair to tell the difference.

I did not retain all/any of the knowledge of artificial hair, but I do remember she always had kickass hair styles.

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7 points

It’s about consent.

The fact that you’ve heard “Don’t touch a black person’s hair” is because SO MANY nonBlack people would just walk up and start touching us without so much as a “How do you do”.

Black people aren’t particularly different than anyone else. The way we are treated is often quite different.

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17 points

Speaking of touching hair, this isn’t really related but what are you supposed to do when holding a baby?
Like I held my family members baby the other day at Thanksgiving and my brain just defaulted to petting their nearly bald head like my cat 😭

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2 points

Either that or chew on its ear. That is normal, right?

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12 points

I think that’s normal, actually. Little kids like affection and caressing their bald head qualifies. I’m not sure what age that ends, though.

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8 points

I’m over 30 but I still like it when my gf gives me head scritches/scalp massages. So I guess never for some?

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6 points

I don’t have kids, but a friend of mine that does commented I sway while carrying a cat in the way someone holding a baby does.

I guess that’s more proof part of the domestication that went on with cats is that they somehow signal “baby” to our minds.

It makes sense it goes the other way too.

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19 points

I’m not black but Hispanic and get this often because of my curly hair. I actually love it but understand some people might not like it. But at least they ask. Had some people just pat my hair to feel it which is really weird.

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8 points

I’m a Latino and I grew out my hair during the pandemic with the goal of donating it. My hair comes out curly when it is long. One day, when we were back to seeing people face to face, a black woman asked if she could touch my hair. I was a little surprised that she asked, lol.

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-1 points

Did you get all offended about it

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1 point

I complained to the manager about not having a safe space and demanded the smokers be evicted. I caused a huge scene and they called security. I went limp so that they had to drag me out of the casino. I have returned everyday holding a picket sign with a picture of a cigarette crossed out in red ink. I will continue to do so until their smoking policy changes.

/s, obviously

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19 points

What is sad is that this will be viewed as normal and acceptable next year because saying it’s not acceptable is “woke.”

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20 points

Are you guys ok over the pond? I thought every panel after the second was just silly but then I read the married guy’s comment…

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8 points

but then I read the married guy’s comment…

Kinda amusing that you didnt take this seriously until you had a white male confirm it for you.

Note: am white male, I just saw the irony (?) in the situation.

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5 points

These aren’t normal questions from strangers. Unless you have a strong reason to, you don’t assume details about people’s lives when getting to know more about them. Even the questions on the left are presumptuous and can represent a faux pas, but they’re mild enough that the recipient would likely correct any wrong premise without making it an incident. But trying to guess details reflects poorly on you if you are wrong. Mostly you would express interest in what you can see about someone as an invitation for them to share more if they care to.

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16 points

Racism is one of the only institutions Americans are still willing to vote to protect.

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