137 points

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45 points

*Too many cooks *

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72 points

In my elementary school play of Cinderella. I was cast as a pile of animated clothes. My role was to lay still and then suddenly spin around like one of those spinning brushes in a carwash and flail off the stage.

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57 points

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68 points

Yeah I tripped, knocked a stage light over, and burned everything to the ground. I was the only survivor.

Was called the “Tragic Cinderella Sizzler” by local newspapers.

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21 points

Are you sure that you’re remembering this right?

I find it hard to believe that the newspaper didn’t come up with a headline based on calling her “Cinders”.

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18 points

To shreds you say?

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61 points

It’s a school activity, why isn’t the school paying for the materials

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59 points

Cause funding

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41 points

In America they make you pay for your child’s own religious indoctrination

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17 points

I would prefer it that way. Government funded religious indoctrination makes me nervous.

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7 points

Cause funding the military is 50% of our taxes 🤸🤼‍♀️🤹‍♂️

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5 points

The military budget is 36x bigger than NASA.

Mars could be the 51st state if the US were not so war hungry.

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15 points

Because this is America. I had to buy a history textbook in high school. Good thing we have enough money for a genocide though /s

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12 points

It’s most likely a private school.

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5 points

“Private school” is what Basic Training should be called.

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4 points

Or sex ed

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6 points

And why is a school doing a nativity.

I’m Christian and have taken part in dozens of nativity, but none at school.

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4 points

Many (but not all) private schools in the US are religious. From elementary school through college I attended Catholic affiliated schools. This sort of display would not be allowed at most public schools, and the ones that would allow it would be sued.

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2 points

Yeah, this isn’t unusual for a religious school.

I remember, as a little girl, playing the part of the angel Gabriel… except I thought the character was named Gabrielle. The only reason I tried for the part was because I thought it was the only explicitly female role, besides Mary (and my unpopular ass wasn’t about to complete for the role of Prima Donna.)

It was a huge let down to find out that Gabriel was yet another male character in the perpetual sausage-fest that is The Holy Bible. Combined with how practically nothing was written about how Jesus would’ve been as a child, I never understood how I was supposed to relate to anything in that book.

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2 points
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50 points

Door? At the nativity? Did they finally got a room on the b&b?

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26 points

Maybe she’s the door the innkeeper slams in their faces.

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21 points
*

There’s actually a Jesus Christ Superstar parody told from the view of the innkeeper (featuring The Mighty Boosh’s Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt, Julia Davis, Rich Fulcher, Matt Lucas, Matt Berry and Richard Ayoade):

AD/BC: A Rock Opera

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4 points

Bless you for sharing this.

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2 points

How do you upvote one thousand times with just one account?

Thank you, kind stranger

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38 points

I thought casting students as inanimate objects or plants only happened in TV shows.

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34 points

No no. I was a tree as a child too. I don’t remember what the play was.

Not to brag, but I was the only tree with a line.

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25 points

It’s a mathematical reality if you want to give every kid in a class a role.

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11 points

Take some liberties: for one, it’s a manger, add animals. For two, it’s a work of fiction, add aliens, or Wookies, or robots. For three, the whole point is to have kids feel included and be interested, so add MDMA or something.

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4 points

With 30 kids there’s still probably 15 playing animals already.

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9 points

I just thought that in real life, when they were out of on-stage roles, other children would do something else. But then again if the children are, like, 7, it’s not like you can assign ALL the jobs to them.

I hadn’t thought about it. But then again, I never did any sort of play at school.

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6 points

Come on, Billy, you need to bulk up by mid December so you’re heavy enough to pull the rope that opens the curtains! The entire play depends on you!

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4 points

No dress rehearsal today, it’s the stage manager’s nap time, go practice your lines for a few hours.

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