Fancy cupcakes are 70% icing, really not that nice and a waste of money
If you ever make your own bathroom or get your choice in the matter, go full french: get the separate porcelain fixture that has separate hot and cold valves, with the soap and towel.
I have a Toto seat and, while it’s nice, the stream is small, leaking potential poo water down your legs onto the inner edges of the seat is… (It doesn’t seem to happen, but still), and the internal warm water tank is small.
I used my ex’s much cheaper one a bunch when we were dating, and his was cold only but like a garden hose flow rate. It was so fucking fast and felt so much nicer. But didn’t oscillate, have aim, pressure, heated seat, dryer, or any of that stuff…
Plus, without the soap, I don’t really want to use a towel to dry my bits off.
So ideally, it would be temperature adjustable, PORCELAIN AND NOT PLASTIC, high flow/adjustable, be an actual bidet where you can fit your hands down there to wash yourself with soap and water, and then have a designated towel so that you eliminate more if not all tp usage.
It’s exactly what it sounds like in this context. Think of a garden hose attachment with a trigger. You point it at the right spot, pull the trigger, and wash your bum clean.
My mental image is in the shower… Yeah, actually, why not just use the shower with a cooter cleaner instead of a bum gun? Or… Are we talking about the same thing?