Am I just crazy, or is the mary illustrated here kind of a bitch? The baby isn’t going to care if you get it a fucking onesie or a lasagna, because it definitely won’t understand anything going on for another year, minimum. If I bring a gift ‘for the baby’ that the parents will use, isn’t that just as good? Maybe gold, incense, and myrrh aren’t the best things to put in the crib, but I’m pretty sure it was some 14-year old hands that opened the gift wrap, and those 14 year old hands can sell the expensive gifts if they want to.
Here are some practical gift ideas for the newborn saviour of humanity:
Baby clothes
Crib
Diapers
Teddy bear
Rattle
Babysitting vouchers
Baby bjorn
Tea (for mum)
Mobile
Chocolate (for mum)
The Hobbit hardcover
I’m not sure how this immaculate conception works, but maybe also baby formula in case Mary wasn’t lactating since this was a… mysterious pregnancy.
Weird nitpick, and I only know this because it was a bar trivia question that I got wrong once: the Immaculate Conception actually refers to Mary’s conception, not Jesus’.
… I know right? Like what?
If you just got done giving birth in a stable because some diety decided to knock you up without your consent then you’ve earned the right to be a bit of a bitch.