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65 points
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There’s a crowdsourced full-length Shakespearean translation of Pulp Fiction called Bard Fiction, and it’s quite good.

JULIUS

Forsooth, did I thy concentration break? Continue, please! Thou did, methinks, now speak Of our ill will. But now thy tongue is still? Allow me, then, to offer a retort. Describe to me Marsellus Wallace, pray.

BRITTANUS

What?

JULIUS

In which far land did thou first come to be?

BRITTANUS

What?

JULIUS

Thou sayest thou dost hail from distant What! I know but naught of thy strange country What. Which language speak they in the land of What?

BRITTANUS

What?

JULIUS

English, base knave, dost thou speak it?

BRITTANUS

Aye!

JULIUS

Then my words are not Greek to thy dull ears.

BRITTANUS Nay!

JULIUS Then hearken to my words and answer them! Describe to me Marsellus Wallace!

BRITTANUS What?

JULIUS (Holds his blade pointed at Brittanus’ eye) Speak “What” again! Thou cur, cry “What” again! I dare thee utter “What” again but once! I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name! Now, paint for me a portraiture in words, If thou hast any in thy head but “What”, Of Marsellus Wallace!

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20 points
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People have actually put it on stage too, it works.

Excerpt from the play: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dfLkcTAR80

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11 points

It really amazes me how theater actors are able to memorize an entire play.

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8 points
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They probably use the memory palace technique. Each line can be thought of as a picture that reminds them of the line. Then you place that picture inside a fake palace or museum in your mind. Then you take a tour of the museum or palace in your head and you remember the lines. The technique is also used to remember large numbers like pi.

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7 points

Oh god! And this comment:

“Dids’t thou see a sign upon my domicile stating “Dead Moor Storage?””

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3 points

Since I posted this I have legit been searching for a wallet that says ‘Rascally Knave’, I need that in my life.

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3 points

😂🙏

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17 points

I like how Julius’ lines fit the pentameter, but Brittanus’ “What?” shits right past it.

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4 points

Does Brittanus speak in prose like Dogberry I wonder.

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2 points

Do you have a link to the full script? I can’t seem to find it

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1 point
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