I am low on money these days and my life is hell for it. I have to do with substandard everything in my life I recently had an incident where an elderly woman asked me for money while roaming the street with her family begging for money. I had no money to spare, but had I had any, I wouldn’t have given a penny to her (Life is tough, I can’t give away money I didn’t earn)
But, she later said something which melted my heart, “Majboori hai beta!” (Hindi) “We don’t want to do this, but we have to do it son” (now add some emotional value to it), I didn’t know what to do, I was on my cycle and I could feel their eyes on me as I passed them and I just peddled faster with teary eyes.
I didn’t know how to deal with that. i.e., I don’t have enough money for medical necessities or to improve the standard of living of my own life, but I was being asked to spare change by a poor family that was demonstrably in a worse spot than me.
I was always taught that if you give beggars money, they will spend it all on alcohol (not blaming them), and given the number of beggars who have come to be smelling like alcohol and death with wobbly balance, it has been a rule not to provide them with money. Also, let’s not forget, if you’re really poor (homeless and have nothing to lose) and you are really desperate, you are often dangerous i.e., not someone around whom your kids can roam, again, not blaming them. But… I don’t know what is right or wrong in this situation!
How do you deal with external problems you can’t solve around you? What is the moral thing to do here?
edit: This kinda reminds of a story about Jesus where a prince once came to him and told him that he isn’t at peace with himself no matter what he does, and Jesus told him that to get peace he must give away everything to the poor and follow Jesus around and the prince refused (something along those lines).
I know what the most moral thing might be in this case, but even if you tell me that I should give money to those who live in abject poverty, I probably won’t do it as often as I should.
Vote for politicians who support UBI.
Give what you can afford. That varies from person to person, and timeframe, but if you truly have nothing to give, then you have nothing to give without impacting your own existance. Plus if you’re a person living off of people’s kindness and get mad when people have nothing, then they aren’t the problem
but if you truly have nothing to give, then you have nothing to give without impacting your own existance.
But I say to myself, if I ever give a little, it’s not gonna have much material impact on their life. i.e., I am not easing their misery for more than an hour! Also, there are many of them, how will I choose whom to give and whom not to? edit: But it’s gonna take away stuff from me, I don’t spend a rupee when I don’t have to.
Is give when you feel like it and when you can (I think you would say yes to this) a good idea?
Easing someone’s misery for an hour IS EASING SOMEONE’S MISERY.
And maybe the physical thing you provide to that person may only last for an hour, but the memory of something a kind person did for them will (hopefully) persist as well
And maybe the physical thing you provide to that person may only last for an hour, but the memory of something a kind person did for them will (hopefully) persist as well
I don’t know if you have been in India but I have. Begging has become a profession there. So most likely they won’t recognize individual donors. Also what OP mentioned is a real problem. Easily you’ll meet more than 20 homeless people at once around you in any big railway station.
From what I understand, shitty politics and rising inequality is the reason behind this.
I volunteer at a food bank once a week. The woman who runs it knows I encounter a lot of homeless camps while hiking with my dogs, so she has me take care packages to deliver to some of them. We are having a very hard time getting can openers, which sucks because so much food we give out is canned. I try and buy any can openers I see at the flea market. But have also purchased a dozen for people in the last few months.
The hand crank can openers aren’t the only kind, there are also cheap, stamped sheet metal can openers with a blade. These are more fiddly but extremely cheap, and do the job.
Here’s some army surplus that’s 50c a pop
https://www.armysurplusworld.com/p38-can-opener?variant=2086
Yes, you beat me to it.
@nocturne@sopuli.xyz shoot me a message on where you’re at. Depending on the country, I may be able to help and send you a hundred of these can openers linked above.
Edit: Give me the food bank’s address please.
I’m not sure how someone could live in a big city without learning to just walk past beggars without making eye contact. I know I sound like a terrible person when I say that explicitly, but it’s what almost everyone actually does. Most other people just don’t want to admit it (to others, and maybe to themselves).
That’s not true in Seattle at all for homeless or down and out. In my experience, it’s only for people who are acting erratic or sketch. We have a newspaper (Real Change) that people sell that makes it easy too. I just give them money and don’t take a paper because I can read it online if I want.
We have a newspaper (Real Change)
of all things you say, that’s the most surprising. Local news papers are becoming a thing of the past for some reason. Next time maybe buy that newspaper, I mean, Local news papers, the remaining ones, are on life support.
I pay for it, I just read it online. It’s written by the people selling and talks about their lives and issues. It’s pretty great.
Years ago, I used to live in a neigborhood just down from what they called ‘the projects.’ Those who couldn’t get into Section 8 housing would spill over onto the streets. One time we had a pretty harsh cold snap. Several people died. A few of us started buying tents, sleeping bags, and blankets from Costco and handing them out to those camping on the sidewalks or side streets.
Now, we live in an area that has pretty good food and housing non-profits, so we donate to them every year. I generally don’t give to individuals, hoping our donations, aggregated with others, will reach more people in need.
During COVID, a local non-profit with an urban garden set up an outdoor fridge and pantry for those sleeping around the perimeter. The non-profit would load it up with any excess produce. But word got out and people started donating, usually leftovers from restaurants. We started going to discount grocery stores and buying bulk foods and stocking up the fridge once a month. Took the kids and had them do the stocking up, just to normalize it.
We’re beyond lucky not to be in that situation and feel strongly that we should help where we can. Paying it forward and all. I don’t think anyone who is pinched should feel bad, but those who can afford it, should.
We’ve never mentioned any of this to any friends or family. I only bring it up here, hoping more people feel inspired to step up.
I generally don’t give to individuals, hoping our donations, aggregated with others, will reach more people in need.
I think that’s a good rule, but it’s not for everyone, i.e., People actually would like to see their money do good, (it’s easier to see a thankful smile on someone than get a digital message on a website) and let’s not forget, people would have to do their own research before donating, because let’s be honest, there so many scammy non-profits made to make money for their corporate overlords (not to mention the conversion rate), if a non-profit is separately pooling money for administration expenses, I would be more likely to trust them. Also, rest of the comment is pretty nice, thanks for the comment!
