I’ve actually skipped work just to help a homeless guy get his beard trimmed. Bought him pizza too. Kinda hard to get anywhere in life when you look like shit.

Be kind to the homeless, they just need a helping hand here and there.

What would you do?

123 points
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44 points

100% this.

I was a volunteer treasurer at a youth homeless shelter.

Sadly, it’s not possible to evaluate someone’s intentions when they knock on your door and ask for a sandwich. They might truly just want a sandwich, or they might have other intentions entirely.

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12 points

Our local cities have been shutting down homeless assistance and food banks. Even the churches aren’t allowed to help anymore… ☹️😭

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-9 points

It’s not typically the person that knocks that you gotta worry about, it’s the person that doesn’t knock that you really gotta worry about.

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19 points

That’s not very true, unfortunately. Knocking allows someone to somewhat figure out if anyone is home, allows a person to gauge who is home (a man or a woman) and how easily the knocker can gauge overtaking them. Breaking in means the homeowner may have time to get a weapon and means the knocker will have to search for anyone home.

Getting them to come up to the door and see if they’re armed makes it easy if a person is looking for a victim. People just breaking in are usually hoping no one is home and just wants to rob the place.

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2 points
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I guess it partly depends how far out in the woods you live. The dogs will announce an intruder before they even get 100 feet close to your home, and I had my cats trained to knock on the door knocker, when they weren’t out eating rats anyways…

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7 points
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3 points

You should never assume any stranger is safe. But take each person’s situation separately, some struggling people are actually legitimately honest.

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67 points
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Hell no.

Are you u all living in rosy mc Rosewood Santa’s little safe harbour everything is fine and dandy rainbow world? Or are you all lying through your teeth?

Letting someone in your home with clearly visible psychological issues, in your circle of trust, filled with those you hold most dearly and packed with your dearest memories, that place… And then letting someone in you know nothing about?

Hell fucking no.

In the real world letting some rando homeless dude in your home has a 50/50 chance of ending up in crazy town. There is a high probability that you, yours or your stuff get fucked up. I cannot and will not accept those odds. Even a 2% chance of shit happening is a risk I’m unwilling to take when it comes to my kids.

Would I help him? Maybe. It depends on some factors (like can I at that specific time, did I help him out earlier, do I have cash on hand) Would I let him in? No f-ing way.

So real answer: money: maybe, eat & drink: anytime. Clothes: I’ve got some you can have, no problem. Bath and clean: nope. Never.

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20 points

This is my thought as well. Even if things go well this time, who’s to say they will not feel entitled to come back. Maybe with or without your knowledge.

I’d send them away otherwise I might start getting a regular visitor to my house asking for stuff.

In public, I’m happy to give money or food.

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-4 points
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While I do agree with you. Your wording could be a little bit better. You seem like a glass half empty kind of person, and I can respect that. However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation. Mental health problems come in all shapes and sizes

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11 points

As someone with diagnosed mental health issues, I can tell you that I mean no harm. But sadly, the pure difference in perception paired with unfamiliarity of the two parties makes the situation insanely dangerous, not the person.

You never know why the person is in this predicament and if they have a tendency towards violence, robbery or other things. I‘m not saying they are. I‘m saying you have to assume they are before making that decision. Can you defend yourself against a pulled knife or even gun, do you have enough mental capacity to observe them at all times. Those odds do not look good.

So, although I would never willingly look down on folks less fortunate than myself. I too will never ever let a stranger into my house if they raise any concerns.

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2 points

Very better wording. Sorry if I was seeming like a dick. I’ve always had the view that people generally mean no harm, but might have articulated it in the wrong way. I’m definitely trying to work on that with myself as well. I also have mental health issues, and I was homeless for a good 2 years of my life, and would have been longer if a person didn’t invite a scruffy person into their home and show them goodness and ask for nothing in return.

After I typed that, I had to think about it for a bit. I was probably one of the few lucky ones. I’ve had the experience working in movie theaters, and I’ve encountered many homeless and have had good and bad experiences. The bad is more memorable (which probably says more about human nature rather than social conception at this point), but had many great experiences with homeless people. I have stories, but I’ll save them for the sake of typing a shit ton lol.

TL;DR: I like the cut of your jib, you seem very intelligent, and have good points. However, I still believe the whole argument comes down to pessimis vs optimism. I’m a very long winded person, so tldr are hard for me

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0 points

“if they raise any concerns”

Yes indeed, those words sum it up pretty well. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.

Everyone deserves a chance though, with caution of course…

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2 points

However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation.

He never said anything like this, and specifically called out pretty low probabilities throughout his comment.

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1 point

I hate linking comments. Sorry, but it took me a bit to type all of that up. So I beg your pardon

https://lemm.ee/comment/13208280

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1 point
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Thank you for your opinion, every individual is different. Homeless does not inherently equate to psychological issues nor drug addiction.

Sometimes people just had their house destroyed from a hurricane or tornado or whatever, and insurance done fucked them over, if they even had proper insurance in the first place.

Sorry you’re getting downvoted, but you got my upvote. Thank you for having enough of a mind and soul to care. 🤗👍

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43 points

I wouldn’t let him in, because my partner has very strong feelings about anyone in the house, but if he doesn’t mind waiting outside he’s getting a lot more than a sandwich and water. A full meal is a very rare thing on the street and some bread and Ham isn’t a meal. I always have left overs or prepped meals ready and he’s eating until he’s full. Water is the same, as much as he can stomach.

I’m no barber, but I can trim my own beard so I’m sure I can manage his. If the stars align, I have a real stylist down the street and I’d happy to ask if she has time for a clean and cut.

Most importantly, I’ve got contact info for shelters and food banks. When if I can’t do anything else I can help find someone who can.

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15 points

Honestly, I didn’t let the fella in either. But I did bring my hair clippers out on the back porch, and made a point to trim both his beard and his head down short.

I’m not a barber either, but hell, there’s a huge difference between looking scraggly versus looking somewhat tidy. I did my best with the clippers, and the fella was very happy with it.

Then I went and bought us some pizza and a couple of beers. Why beer? Because I’m generous sometimes, plus beer is cheaper than water in my area.

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35 points

The food and water part, no problem. Strangers in my apartment is a hard no! Sorry.

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34 points

Fix him a sandwich, get him some water, and tell him I don’t let strangers in my house.

I’ve done just that, twice in the twenty odd years I’ve owned it. Before that, my dad owned it and had different rules about who had access to resources, so I would have followed his, if it had arisen.

But! I would offer to bring my spare trimmer and hook him up on the porch, or a shave if he wanted. That used to be part of my job, and I miss the hell out of personal care. I’d also offer to let him use a mirror instead though.

I’m hard core about no strangers in the house, period, ever. Don’t care why they want in, don’t care who they are, if I haven’t said it’s okay, nobody comes in. Hell, there’s people we know that aren’t allowed in. I’ve got one cousin in particular that will get his ass beat again if he shows up. But someone we don’t know, that I haven’t vetted? Hellll no.

Shit, I’d rent a motel room for a homeless person before I’d let the cleanest, best dressed stranger in my house, and I’m on a fixed income.

But, I’m actually known to be a soft touch for food and beverage. It’s a thing. If I know you well enough to let you in, you will never go hungry at my house. If I don’t know you well enough to invite you in, I still won’t let you go hungry or thirsty, but I’ll ask you to move along with the supplies. I’d have to have my family be starving before I’d refuse basic food and water to someone.

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3 points

I’ve got one cousin in particular that will get his ass beat again if he shows up.

Chuck? Is that you?

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1 point

Sorry, but no.

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1 point

I’m curious what you mean by fixed income.

Do you mean a non hourly salary? Is that is what you mean, why does it matter?

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1 point

Fixed income is a general term for someone that can’t change their income because it is provided by a social safely net. In my case, that’s the US disability system, SSDI in specific. You get a monthly income and that’s that. There is some wiggle room for other income, but if most of the people on SSDI could do enough work for that, they wouldn’t qualify for SSDI in the first place.

But it also refers to retired people on social security, and sometimes even people that get income from a pension.

In other words, the amount you get is not only “fixed”, there isn’t a way to increase it reliably.

There in the US, even the maximum SSDI amount you can get is below the poverty line. We’re lucky in that there are three adults on various SS programs, so we do have a little disposable income at the end of the month, but we’re talking maybe twenty or thirty bucks.

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2 points
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Thanks for explaining.

I always thought it exclusively meant that someone had retired and were on pension but I doubt there are many if any that old on Lemmy.

The term doesn’t really exist where I live. Or at least as far as I know.

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-9 points

Not the hero we deserve nor the one we need.

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