To clarify the question somewhat, what I mean is: does having loved ones and/or a cause you’re willing to die for give you strength? Or, does it instead expose a vulnerability to be exploited?
This post was originally much longer, but I’ve cut it down to keep it a bit more open ended. I know that the phrasing is somewhat misleading. In a way, you never really possess someone or a community or even something to lose, they’re just people or things or causes for which you care deeply, and that care opens up the possibility for emotional pain that can be exploited. At the same time having those cares can give you a reason to live, a cause to fight for, a person for whom you are there to ride or die for.
I suppose the question I ultimately want to ask is, which ends up playing out more in your life experience? Someone exploiting your love/care as a weakness? Or that love/care motivating you to defend them to the bitter end?
I know this is likely to be a “it depends” answer, but if you have some further insights, I’d be greatly appreciative. Thanks in advance.
Depends on whether you are real person in real life, or captured spy in a movie.
Seriously, there are, in fact, stupid questions.
I think this question is more suited for asklemmy community.
Both
Both. There are situations where either of this applies. Or both. People regularly fight over things, land or other people. To their own benefit and it makes them stronger, or more determined. At the same time the same thing can be exploited by other people. Or even get lost due to circumstances, breaking someones spirit. It’s all of this.
And you better have something to lose, or there isn’t much of value in your life.
inb4 “it depends” but, well, really, it depends, on the what.
Having something to lose because you care for them means they are a liability and a weak point that can be exploited. They are also a natural distraction. In that sense, their presence and status as “things to care for” make you weaker; however, the fact that you care grants you motivation, as well as spite, that can be pretty hard to find elsewhere. You won’t find people who truly care so much as to give their lives for their employer, even top level bootlickers shy away once things get dicey. And spite is quite the damn effective motivator! So, the fact that you can have something to lose promotes you to keep up a higher “action baseline”: waking up in the mornings, keeping yourself healthy and open enough to actually go and protect, etc…; those make you stronger.
As someone who has had 8 cats before and has also provided support for 7 other ones, I can easily tell that their cute little purrs are energizing and I’m more active and aware of the world around me simply because I have to find good quality cat food for cheaper. So if anything I’m a “stronger” agent in the commerce.
