Don’t try to explain the fediverse
What if we’re both nerds? Do I have your blessing to explain the fediverse in that case?
Guys: Fascinate her with a wheel of cheese.
To be honest, there’s a certain subset of women who love it when guys go full removed. If you are obsessed with cheese, and can talk about cheese with passion in a way to captivate any audience, then don’t hide or downplay it. Literally talk about cheese like you’re a 2am Youtuber and girls will love it.
Can confirm this, the amount of genuine attention I received while losing my mind talking about Warhammer 40k with dates is unbelievable!
Of course, you should probe a bit beforehand. I got lucky and my dates were pretty much all into fantasy stuff, so 40k wasn’t a huge leap, but there was no interest expressed in 40k other than specifically to hear me talk about it.
Edit: I know this is a meme subject, but I’m dead serious about it.
They don’t owe you anything. Not sex, not a kiss, not a hug, not a second date, not even a smile. If the date goes well, you will get some or even all of those but if you try to force them, you will get nothing. Sure it can be disappointing if you put in a lot of effort and get nothing back but you will have to live with that. Sometimes people just aren’t compatible and sometimes a date just goes wrong because of a weird coincidence.
Be nice, even if the date doesn’t go as you wanted. Open communication goes a long way and chances are that the person you’re talking to is just as insecure as you are. Explain (not accuse) why you don’t think this situation will work out. If you’re lucky, you can turn the conversation around. If not, at least you’re ending the date in a civil way. That also (and especially) applies to talking on online dating platforms. Sometimes you can tell just from a conversation that things won’t go anywhere. Way too many people just drop the conversation and move on which can feel pretty rude. Be nice, explain what’s up, give them a friendly goodbye and then move on.
Those rules apply to both sides. You don’t owe them anything either, especially if they get rude. You should still try to be friendly in case there is a misunderstanding but try to get yourself out of an uncomfortable situation before it gets worse. Your safety is still priority number one.
Edit: some more
Don’t expect a relationship to last. Chances are it won’t. But this isn’t as pessimistic of a tip as you might expect. Even a single day of joy can be worth it if you manage your expectations. I’ve had a relationship crash and burn after seven years, I’ve had ones that lasted a couple of months and I’ve had someone ghost me after the second date. And still, all of them gave me amazing memories that I wouldn’t want to miss and they helped me grow as a person. Allow things to grow on their own and enjoy the process. Maybe you will marry that person. Maybe you’ll date them for a few months or years. Maybe you will never get past second base but stay platonic friends. Maybe you will spend the most amazing day of your life with them and then never see them again because you accidentally spilled something over their favorite t-shirt.
I heard that Carbon14 was an efficient solution
Dont be fake. Dont lie. Dont cheat.
Be kind, listen as much as you speak. Ask clarifying questions.
Dont assume mundane things mean what you think they mean. “Sometime” might mean “its a neat idea” to someone where to someone else say “sometime” as in very very soon. Like soon.
Ask, Don’t assume.
No means no. When they say no thank you, you say “ok!” And walk away. You dont demand reasoning or another chance. Life isnt the movies.
No means no anytime.
Your name gets around if you are nice or if you are shitty. Dont be shitty.
Good sex is about communication not the “perfect” body. Porn isn’t reality. Ask questions. Be receptive. Share. Talk.
Ask, dont assume.
Work on being a kind and good person. Keep yourself clean. No one owes you anything. Be someone worth hanging out with.
