Must go cheaper: caffeine pills.
I don’t even buy avocado toast, I should be a billionaire by now
That’s your problem. If you never buy it in the first place, you can’t stop buying it. You can’t save nothing from nothing!
Here, let me help you out:
- Be rich
- Squander your money on avocado toast and greater luxuries
- Stop squandering your money on these things
- Now you’re rich.
If you don’t do 2., how can you expect 3. to work?!
Have you tried being born into wealth?
It’s less a lack of willingness - I’m just never presented with opportunities to massively defraud corporations
You don’t defraud corporations, that’ll earn you the scorn of powerful people. You defraud poor people.
Oh, you can defraud shareholders as well. You just have to tell more compelling lies and secure the right accomplices. Get the auditors on board and you can ride the sinking ship for at least a couple years before you finally run out of cash and the entire organization collapses within a matter of days.
Still tastes better at least