when i was a child, i had a tendency to extremely hyper fixate on various topics for months, so now that i’m older it just feels like i’ve experienced everything even though I technically haven’t. the fixations are becoming much more quick in terms of cycles / how long they (don’t) last and i spend most of my time feeling bored and empty, just rotting away and feeling entertained by nothing. lately this has caused me to get really stuck in the past, so i spend a lot of time just laying in bed crate digging my own memories and feeling kind of depressed because i have nothing new to be excited by or interested in. it does not help that i don’t really have any long term goals or ambitions either, i just kind of exist.
does anyone else feel like this?
This may be adult disenchantment. I think this is a general progression of how we see the world.
I personally still have a ton of awesome things to deal with etc, but absolutely, diving into fantasy dreamworlds is farer away
I felt that being like 15 years old, then got excited over one girl (that worked as a temporary solution), then she ditched me, so I have a good fat trauma to return to if bored.
I feel pretty much the same way… Do you feel more lonely than before your excitement run out?
Career-wise, yes, in my experience.
When you start out in junior positions, you don’t tend to have a lot of autonomy in your work life. Other people are setting priorities, deadlines etc, and you’re just along for the ride.
As your career advances, you tend to take on more leadership duties. You’re more responsible for managing your own work, and then eventually other peoples’ as well. This is where executive functioning deficits tend to start to really hit home.
It’s not for nothing that a lot of people get diagnosed in middle age.
It sounds like you’ve developed depression and it’s making your ADHD symptoms worse.
See a therapist if you can afford it, or at least a regular doctor and get some antidepressants