So I tend to dress “well”. I’m not great at fashion, but I shave every morning, force myself to spend a bit of money on nice tshirts, etc.
On the weekends though, I let it all go. I go out to the store in my PJs, I don’t shave, I wear my hat and hoodie up, and to be honest look a bit like a thug. I notice people on the street are a little less comfortable walking by, however…
One thing that stood out insanely was the grocery store. When I dress like a homeless person, it is night and day difference:
- Cashier keeps the checkout stuff closer to them
- While my card transaction is pending, if I start loading stuff in my bag they’re like “oh, oh wait… It’s still pending”
- Even when I start the small-talk (“How is your day going?”), responses are short
When I dress well:
- Cashier doesn’t mind when I start loading my backpack even before paying
- Cashiers always smile and ask how my day is
I was planning on writing a blog post about it (plug to !dginovker_blog@lemmy.ml), but wanted to get more data points first
Interesting, what happens when it’s the same cashier in the two situations?
White guy in Japan. A lot of people will assume I don’t speak any Japanese (=am a tourist). I’ve had it many times where after a transaction at a shop, the staff literally tells me “I’m so glad you spoke Japanese, I was so afraid when you walked up since I can’t speak English”
Same boat. I’m yet to find a good response to that. On one hand, I want to be like “haha yea”, but on the other hand, I want to be modest and not comment on it… Which is just like an awkward silence. I usually just say something like “oh yea I used to live here” but even that feels like oversharing :p
I’ve into the goth scene for about two thirds of my life now, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked if I’m sad or depressed. Back in college I showed up to class with some elbow length fingerless gloves, and the dude I usually sat next to practically tore them off because he thought I was covering up cutting myself. His defense was “I have a friend who dresses kind of like you, and they were those gloves to cover up scars.” Well, my dude, I am not your friend and you now no longer have a study partner. I sat elsewhere the rest of the semester.
I thought I was the only one. I grew up in po dunk AR. And being black students and teachers treated me like shit. Going so far as to give me F’s until I proved it to the princepal that it was because my race. He told me the next paper she asks you to write come to me and tell me what it was about and I will write it for you. I did as he said. He wrote it and I handed it in as my own and gave me an F. I showed him the paper he called my teacher to the office while I was sitting there and asked wtf was up with this. She had no answer but studdering. She re-evaluated my papers and gave me all A’s. Probably not the same thing as you but many time I had white paint thrown on me because I was black and they did not want a black student but thats another tale.
Growing up brown skinned I was not allowed in some of my white skinned friends’ houses because their parents thought I would steal stuff.
Oh man, one time I got judged hard at a job interview just for having tattoos. The interviewer didn’t even bother asking about my experience, just kept asking if I “planned on getting more ink.” It was really frustrating, but I ended up finding a way better job a few weeks later that didn’t care about tattoos. Sometimes these things just work out.
Depends on where I work as a Nurse…most places are cool with scrubs and showing tatoos but there was a couple places I was stationed at that forbid them and had you cover them up. I thought it was stupid because patients would ask why are you wearing long sleeves when its like 100 degrees or something.
