160 points

I think the “oh, fuck, that was an invitation!” moment several minutes/hours after the fact is one of the most universal moments.

permalink
report
reply
58 points

Years.

permalink
report
parent
reply
17 points
*

Lifetimes. Because I haven’t had it yet…

(ok maybe I would if I talked to women in the first place)

permalink
report
parent
reply
12 points

One time a girl invited me to sleep with her, and I looked at her filthy pillowcases and bullshitted my way into sleeping on her couch, after countering her insistence with the extreme option of “if you’re not gonna let me sleep on your couch, I’m going home.”

I thought she literally meant actual sleep, and what she wanted was sex.

I slept on her couch and she sobbed softly through a closed door.

I found out about a decade later, from a mutual friend, that girl had the biggest hots for me and was gonna stop at nothing to fuck me.

Well, she was stopped by my obliviousness.

I was ace and sex-repulsed even back then, so even if I had figured her out, I prolly would have had a small panic attack and tried to go home.

permalink
report
parent
reply
39 points

Yup. The first one I remember is a concert where I went to see the opener and didn’t much care for the main act. While I was on the floor during the opening act, I was next to a girl who seemed similarly enthused about that band. We definitely both noticed each other fangirling over this relatively unknown opening act. Then, afterward, I bumped into her on the balcony while the main act was playing, and she’s like “these guys kinda suck right? I think I’m gonna head out and get a drink at $nearby_bar”. And I totally missed the hint.

permalink
report
parent
reply
31 points

why can’t they just add a “wanna join me” to make it more clear lol

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

Right? They are terrible at flirting.

permalink
report
parent
reply
6 points
*

When I was 19, a girl told me at a party that I was the coolest guy in school. I was just flattered by the compliment and when I told my girlfriend about it later she said “Yeah she was totally hitting on you”.
I was like “Nah! Her? No way!”
Years later, I randomly thought about it and went “oh my god, she was hitting on me!”

permalink
report
parent
reply
118 points

I know that this is a male pov but seriously that is also an L for the lady. Can’t be throwing hints and expect everyone to be Mr hint getter

permalink
report
reply
-36 points

Idk it’s not really a hint, that’s pretty direct. If I were her I’d assume I got rejected.

permalink
report
parent
reply
181 points

This is not direct at all though. Direct is “my shift is almost done, do you want to hang out later?”. Being direct means you do actually have to include saying what you want.

permalink
report
parent
reply
-15 points

Yeah, even when you’re 99% sure the person is flirting with you, you gotta balance that with what might happen if you’re wrong.

Read the situation wrong and you could end up handcuffed on the sidewalk with pepper spray in your eyes.

Fuck that. If not being willing to take that risk means dying alone, I’ll choose the latter.

And what about from the woman’s perspective? Do you really want strange men making guesses about whether you’re flirting with them or not? Knowing exactly what could happen if the wrong guy gets the wrong idea and won’t take “no” for an answer?

I’m not trying to victim-blame or make excuses for anyone. But there’s nothing to win by playing these kinds of mind games, so what’s the fucking point?

permalink
report
parent
reply
55 points

In the context of a conversation about people who come in just before closing it could also just be taken as a hint that he is one of those people.

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

Yeah, if I was smoother with women, I’d have probably gone with ‘is that you trying to make weekend plans, or telling me to gtfo?’ but in a casual way so she knows I’m not offended.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

That’s… How I took it before reading the comments…

permalink
report
parent
reply
0 points

Yeah, if I was smoother with women, I’d have probably gone with ‘is that you trying to make weekend plans, or telling me to gtfo?’ but in a casual way so she knows I’m not offended.

permalink
report
parent
reply
100 points

To be fair, it could have just as easily been:

“You know, my shift is almost over (so I really want to pack my shit and get out of here)” to which anon had a good response.

permalink
report
reply
95 points

I have been specifically and repeatedly told women at work don’t want flirting or any other interpersonal interactions. So that shit is shut completely off when in public.

permalink
report
reply
70 points
*

And that’s absolutely true! Until the one time it’s not, and then it’s your fault for not knowing.

TBF, I normally go by “off limits unless they make an obvious move”.

Which the cashier definitely did. Of course, like the OP I wouldn’t realize it till later…

permalink
report
parent
reply
26 points

The hard part is the knowing that so called obvious move.

permalink
report
parent
reply
16 points

You can usually tell by their feet. For example, if they’re behind their head.

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

Hindsight is always 20:20.
Just wait patiently for the realisation that’ll pop into your head 2 years later just as you’re falling asleep .

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

But was it an obvious move, or did you read too much into the friendliness they’re paid to show all customers?

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

Without being there it’s always a guess. But putting “You know” at the front like that is pretty damn explicit. She wasn’t just making a random comment. That’s like movie trope obvious.

There are always outliers though, she could of had a brain fart, or he could have said something to make her believe he felt she was working late.

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

That’s when you ask things plain and simple. One of my exes was the manager for a fast food joint and at the end of her shift, sitting at my table and kinda chatting away. At some point I simply asked her “so are we going back to your place to make sweet love after that, or what?” with my french accent on full blast. It had the desired effect of making things clear.
I wish I had had the balls to do that more often in my life!

permalink
report
parent
reply
84 points

That is 100% me. I’ve had many friends tell me someone was into me but I’m usually oblivious. I never want anyone to feel awkward or intruded upon and basically never act on such opportunities. I would love to, but my mind is usually partitioned off on a half dozen other projects, and at least one big rabbit hole of a curiosity. I have the capacity to shift my attention, but it takes someone being quite forward or otherwise remarkable in ways beyond a casual encounter or simple looks to capture my attention in a way where I might take spontaneous initiative. Basically, every girl I encounter is like my sister on a platonic level unless I have a clear indication otherwise. All my long term relationships are from social encounters with friends of friends where over time I could tell there was clear chemistry. Just saying, if you’re a girl, being direct and forward is quite effective with some of us, especially the more quiet types.

permalink
report
reply

Greentext

!greentext@sh.itjust.works

Create post

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you’re new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

  • Anon is often crazy.
  • Anon is often depressed.
  • Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

Community stats

  • 6.5K

    Monthly active users

  • 964

    Posts

  • 22K

    Comments