Top screenshot and [left] transcript are real and verbatim from Sept 4 broadcast on national TV.

161 points
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“Fellas, is it gay to use a straw?”

Fragile snowflake weirdos more obsessed with dicks than I am, and I’m gay as fuck.

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64 points

It is important to keep stressing the “weirdo” line. It’s super effective.

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17 points

Calling a reactionary a weirdo got me banned in one of the political communities recently. Mod called it attacking language

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25 points

That mod is a weirdo

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8 points

Name and shame. The top of every sub should include a breakdown of the mods and their moderation stats. The way it’s currently designed enables propaganda and misinformation as much as Reddit ever did.

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24 points

I like to suck on straws with milkshakes so hard, that my cheeks implode.

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9 points

Like a reverse Louis Armstrong.

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4 points

Satchmo Suckmo

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10 points

Only if you suck until the creamy goodness reaches your lips.

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7 points

I don’t care for dicks, but I do love to suck

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7 points

Depends if the straw was made from fossilized unicorns or not.

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7 points
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Are you using staws in your vanilla ice cream shakes tho?

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8 points

That’s a good point. You may be attracted to men and enjoy having sex with them… but Fox News only says you’re gay if you use a straw for a fast food drink.

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5 points

Any time you close your mouth over something and suck, you a gay man! That’s why real men don’t own Stanley’s!

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4 points

I’m gay as fuck.

How much straws do you use?

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3 points

None. I deep throat all bottles and cups and then pass all remaining plastic through my superior digestive tract like a real man. /s

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3 points

Amazing. I wish they had contacted you to speak at the DNC! Or the RNC, for that matter…

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92 points

Well, nothing is more suggestively manly than this:

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12 points
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A man with tiny hands has to throw his glass of water because he can’t set it down gracefully. Fuck, it’s already been four years.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GO_BdivESOk

Edit: He’s much more coherent in this clip than in anything today.

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7 points

The crowd goes crazy because … checks video … he drank watet from a glass??!

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3 points

Lol, look at those things… They really are rather small.

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6 points

Honestly, that’s how I’d imagine an 80 year old drinking. Removing the weave and orange tan and it looks about right.

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15 points

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1 point

This is amazing. Did you do it yourself?

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62 points
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Who the fuck doesn’t drink a milkshake with a straw?

Are all these strawless non-gay heterosexual manly men walking around with milk mustaches like 5 year olds? Is this what women are into?

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15 points

No, these strawless, non-gay, heterosexual, manly men are just like me. They were handed a spoon, but not a straw in the drive through and they decided to just drive off rather than bother or inconvenience someone, even though it wouldn’t be a bother or inconvenience, it’s the person’s job, and they’d be happy to help. I am married though, so while I wouldn’t say my wife is specifically attracted to that brand of social awkwardness, she’s not entirely repulsed by it.

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8 points

I feel comfortable answering that last question!

No

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8 points

Who the fuck doesn’t drink a milkshake with a straw?

Weird people.

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2 points

.>

<.<

I really prefer my milkshakes at the level of ‘the-straw-barely-closes-when-you-suck-so-you-gotta-use-a-spoon’ but not to the firmness of ice cream itself.

So… me?

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59 points

They know they are full of shit. The know they are lying.

They are just evil cunts that spread hate and lies to manipulate people.

I’ve said it before. There are only 2 types of right wingers. They are either stupid or evil. Sometimes both. But it’s always at least one of the 2.

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10 points
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here are only 2 types of right wingers. They are either stupid or evil. Sometimes both.

True, but I know people who are other categories. They have mental and/or social issues. The big social issue is tribalism - some go along to get along to survive in their social and work environments.

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5 points

I know plenty of people with social issues that try to support others instead of being whiny conservatives and shit. Social issues are important to consider in how to address a lot of that stuff but the people themselves, at some point, need to take responsibility for acting out like they do.

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2 points
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That falls under the stupid category.

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2 points

I know some intelligent Trumpets, and the mental gymnastics they make is a Simone Biles level event.

Maybe that’s “evil” but they see themselves as “good” and doing the right thing.

I think it’s a third category. “Brainwashed”, or something.

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49 points
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No, what it tells me is how little dirt you have to sling at Walz.

Whereas Trump is a twice-impeached felon with dozens of convictions and a judge had to remind people in court that he raped the defamation litigant. He also insults disabled people and veterans and lies with every breath. Oh, and he participated in a failed coup against the American People. Trump and Fox “News” should stop attacking their betters…

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