68 points
*

USA edition:

If you’re a billionaire: vote Republican.

If you’re not a billionaire: vote Democrat.

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15 points

(*) may not apply in elections where the Republican wants to start a profit-conflagarating civil war

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3 points

War is a racket.

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1 point

Brilliant book. Still relevant.

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6 points

And either way, you still get to be poor. Great system we have here.

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3 points

Pop quiz! What was cumulative inflation for the last 4 years, and what was the change in working class wages?

Basically what I’m asking is, did people get more poor, or less poor? Were there any specific government actions that led to this outcome?

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-1 points

69

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-1 points

Unfortunately the official inflation number doesn’t represent real world price increases on necessary goods, which often outpace inflation.

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2 points

At least you get to be poor with some basic human rights

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2 points

This is what Democrats would put on their campaign signs if they were an honest party.

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2 points

Me, LGBT: hahahahaha… oh you were serious? HAHAHAHAHA no.

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1 point

We didn’t need that.

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37 points
*

Make a budget, each month.

Write down your expected expenses. Keep it simple. Use paper and a calculator.

Rewrite the list, in order of priority, to you.

I’ve met so many people who are scared to do this, yet would be pleased if they did.

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6 points

And compare your expected expenses to your actual expenses. Those occasional small things here and there can add up.

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36 points

For bills that are due on a regular basis but not monthly (car registration, oil changes, pet’s annual check up, HVAC check ups if you own a home, etc) - figure out how much each costs per year, add them all up, divide by 12, and set up an auto-transfer to a savings account for that amount every month. Don’t forget to include that amount in your monthly budget too.

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12 points

This x100. I literally never worry about bills anymore.

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18 points

Actually it’s x12

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28 points

Invest in tennis balls. They have a high rate of return.

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18 points
*

Serious version. Probably mostly US-centric:

Credit cards are a tool. Just like any other tool, they can be useful or they can cause damage when improperly used. Educate yourself on how to wield a credit card effectively.

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6 points

Credit cards are a tool. Just like any other tool, they can be useful or they can cause damage when improperly used. Educate yourself on how to wield a credit card effectively.

What he’s trying to say is, learn to use them like ninja stars - shuriken. They’re sharp and deadly if scaled properly.

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3 points

When I worked at Barnes&Noble as a teen (~2007-2008), my coworker and I would just whip gift cards around at each other. Was a good three months.

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2 points

Maybe like nunchucks. Use them wrong and they’ll whack you in the nuts.

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25 points

Inherit your wealth!

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