Like you’re one of a kajillion people who have ever lived, like an ant, and if someone came along and stepped on you, you’d be dead, just like most of the kajillion people who have ever lived, only to be replaced by another.

ETA- also sweaty, yawny, and either very interested or very not interested in sex and/or food.

First week it made me feel like there was a very light electric current running through my body. Not unpleasant, just a bit odd. Tingly. And yawning uncontrollably for a few hours after taking them for a few weeks.

Again, not unpleasant. But I absolutely embraced them, I did not fight the effects. I was very, very glad to try medications.

Now, after like 4 or 5 years, I can clearly tell the difference between before and after - the difference is, instead of downward spiralling into a hideous pit that I couldn’t climb out of, that spiralling downwards still starts, but it stops.

Instead of falling into the pit, I can just choose not to keep going down.

Things are still upsetting and I still take things worse than other people but I dont become out-of-control spiralling downwards forever until I can’t function. I have gained the ability to shrug and go “that sucks but, whatever”.

Like the first ten minutes after waking up from a really hard, hot, nap, all day, every day.

Grey, faded, like everything was some distance away.

Totally not for me.