This has been nurdling round in my brain for a bit, then I heard one of Belle Robertson’s one minute audios that really helped clarify it.

Sober supports/tools can b split into five categories. You don’t have to jump in with both feet and do all the things (although I do recommend doing food and sleep every day), but if your sobriety starts feeling a bit rocky, can you add in a new support? don’t try harder, try different.

connection/group/you’re not alone in this:

listening to sober audios/podcasts

face to face meetings, zoom meetings

reading other sober stuff (newsletters, blog, quit lit)

Self-soothing (calm calm calm things)

Going to bed (there’s nothing like being under the duvet, in your pyjamas with your teeth cleaned for stopping a booze run)

Time with pets

treats

nice alcohol-free drinks

Treats planned in advance - bath, haircut, cookies

change the channel in your head

Music

A TV show/movie that you will get into

Going for a run/walk/bike ride

Yoga

Prayer, meditation

Self-care (these can blur into self-soothing, but to me, self-care items are the basics you need to stay alive)

Food

Shower

Exercise

Sleep

Accountability

Sober coach

addiction counsellor

Sponsor

Therapist

apps (in my first month, the knowledge that I’d have to reset three different trackers, and that I couldn’t be arsed, kept me sober more than once).

I find cravings can be addressed with HALT the BS

am I Hungry Angry Lonely Tired or Thirsty Bored Stressed or Sad

if I work out which one of the above applies, and address that, then cravings will typically disappear.

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HALT the BS. ffs, thank you!

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Thank you for posting this.

The more dimensions of traction one applies to one’s unconscious, the more-likely one is to succeed in getting it to evolve.

_ /\ _

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In my experience, willpower alone isn’t going to work. You use up willpower in a thousand different ways from the minute you open your eyes and get out of bed, and by the time your personal witching hour comes round, you’re all out of the willpower required to resist that glass of wine, and by the time you’ve drunk it, you’re definitely out of willpower to refuse the second or third or fuck it, might as well finish the bottle.

So you support your willpower, and strengthen it with scaffolding, sober supports, tools, stuff you can lean on when the cravings hit.

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Would you share the apps you found useful plz?

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I use Easy Quit Drinking, Try Dry and I Am Sober (all Android, but probably available for Apple as well).

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I’m not one for groups as an introvert, but I listen to the Recovery Elevator podcast for the connection piece. My dog is my best buddy, and he always just listens and lets me rubber duck my problems.

Now that the weather doesn’t suck, I’m going for a run when I get the “this calls for a drink” kinda frustration. Yard work is becoming my new meditation.

Play the tape forward is a classic goto. The tried and true, sleep it off and try again tomorrow hasn’t failed me yet.

… Oh and I use the Habits app with a “IWNDWYT” widget to count my days. I tick it off in the morning and the mental hurdle to uncheck the box and break my streak helps against even having one drink.

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Marijuana

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That’s not legal where I am, but I imagine it comes under “change the channel in your head”?

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This is a place to motivate each other to control or stop drinking. It is also a place for non drinkers to discuss and share.

We welcome anyone who wishes to join in by asking for advice, sharing our experiences and stories, or just encouraging someone who is trying to quit or cut down.

Please post only when sober; you’re welcome to read in the meanwhile.

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