I was stuggling with this a lot (mostly successfully, I hope?) when we were playing Zombicide. None of us knew the game, we were confused by some rules and we got out asses kicked bad in the first tutorial scenario, but having experience from turn based games like X-Com, I felt like I had to bite my tongue a lot during the evening, especially once I realised that the margins for error are much smaller than I expected.

You’re a good game ambassador. Keep trying.

Allowing for newer gamers to actually engage with the system is what is fun for them, same as all players. They won’t have fun just watching someone who knows what to do play their turn for them. Idk if it would work, but it might be worth trying instituting a rule between your partner and you before a game night starts that says the more experienced players will only offer advice when asked? It might help, just spit balling.

My personal strategy I liked to do when I showed new people pandemic was asking what people around the table thought was important at key moments, as well as being vocal about the processes in the game. That way there is 2 way active discussion. If I can realize from those conversations that less experienced players are missing something (like it’s been a little too long since seeing an epidemic card) I make sure to state that during my “what I think is important” contribution.

I try to make sure I’m not using language that makes it appear that I think my ideas are better than theirs, instead I try to talk as a GM who is making sure everyone knows objective facts about the game state and what may happen.

In my experience, doing that as well as constantly talking about game state and mechanics for new people such as, “remember, the next time we get an epidemic card (whenever that may be) London is going to outbreak,” shows critical phases of the game that the group should be concerned with, but when it’s worded like that you aren’t putting pressure on the players to do anything about it outright. it still allows them the freedom to say “I don’t think that’s going to sink us, I wanna focus on blah blah blah on my turn.”

Thats seems to be the best technique that I’ve found to take the pressure off of them to listen to the experienced players and fall in line. When the experienced players aren’t dictating a course of action, but rather are stating what is going on and asking what we should do as a group to new players, it allows new players at the table to feel situationally aware and make confident choices because they feel included and like they aren’t missing anything.

(I should point out that your partner shouldn’t be answering you if you ask haha of course they already know. it’s about coercing the newbies into playing rather than watching. not trying to insult, but if your partner struggles with alpha gaming they gotta know that isn’t a question for them to answer)

I wish you luck.

There’s nothing better than showing someone that game and they take a risk (either intentionally or not), it blows up in their face, and they have to scramble to recover and just BARELY scrape by with a ton of luck.

This is part of why I can’t enjoy pandemic. (The other big part being we had a real life pandemic and it was nothing like the game)

Teaching gracefully is a skill I don’t really have. So it’s easy for me to fall into “no, that’s a bad move because XYZ” and most people don’t like that.

You can kind of see this in my other posts in this thread where I would be annoyed at players for making tactical blunders in DND.

At least I recognize this is almost entirely a me problem, and that’s the first step towards not being a total party shitter.