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67 points

My spouse was admitted to hospital for two weeks and had several geriatric roommates. The nurse asked one of them if she knew where she was, and she yelled “IN SATAN’S ASSHOLE”.

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51 points

Oh so Texas?

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21 points

That actually isn’t even much of a stretch for Texas names. I live near the Devil’s Backbone.

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4 points

So you live just north of Satan’s asshole. Got it.

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2 points
2 points

Satan’s asshole in Texas is called Dan Patrick.

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1 point

More specifically, Houston.

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7 points
*

Nurse here: we ask ‘orientation’ questions as part of our assessment

I had a younger patient going through the straights with hallucinations (newly diagnosed schizophrenia)… and I had been asking the same questions (as we do) a lot

So I asked them once again, “Do you know why you’re in the hospital?”. Their response: “Deez nuts!”

I always appreciate a good “Deez nuts” joke, but that one has been my favorite so far. The volition on their face and the shitty smirk; they’re completely tied down with a guard because they would occasionally be violent… but hot damn, that was a zinger.

I counted their response as oriented— they know what they did lol

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2 points

I like that so much! Deez nuts lol.

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