I went and took maternity pictures with my wife yesterday and she was having so much fun. I didn’t complain because I didn’t want to ruin it, but I was so mad at myself because it was all I could focus on.
I’d forget for a second and make a joke to make her laugh and then right back into focusing on the pain.
I’m about burned out with it. I’ll have a good week followed by three months of nonstop misery. I can’t take pain meds because I’m a former addict. I’m terrified to have surgery for that reason.
I don’t know. Sorry to put this here. I wish I were better at suffering in silence. I know I’ve gotta be driving her crazy groaning all the time. I try not to, which makes me super aware of it. It sucks.
It is what it is and we get what we get, but damn I wish I could get some real relief. I’m feeling alright at this moment because I’ve had 4 12% alcohol beers, but when I wake up in the morning I’ll probably spend the first 5 hours of my day wishing I could just be unconscious.
I appreciate that you shared it. It’s nice to know I’m not alone in the challenges I face with pain. I’m sorry that you have to deal with that experience.
I like to think that we’re stronger for having to go through stuff like that, but sometimes it just feels like suffering for no reason lol.
It’d be nice to not suffer from what I do, and therefore not have constant pain, but also that person wouldn’t be me ig? Idk maybe that’s stupid but I think all I can do to keep going is try to be as positive as I can be.
Sorry if I rambled here. I hope things get better for you somehow fr <3
