Why are people like this? Shit life syndrome. What do we do with them? Offer them compassion and support.
Or sometimes they already have a good life (house, kid, spouse, dogs, x2 cars and stable support) and instead they decide to burn it all down in favor of a two-week crack bender. She drained our bank account, caught a DV charge and we are now divorced, thank fuck.
Hey man. I am really sorry for you. Was there any indication to why the substance abuse started?
Equal parts narcissism, bad company, deteriorating mental health and poor decisions. I had a whole thing typed up, but I’ve aired this shitshow elsewhere before. The short version is she has been a problem at every job she ever held, so she opened her own bakery and proceeded to drive it into the ground within about six months. She hung out with some shady people who did shady things, and got wrapped up in her own wants and desires. She eventually walked out (after hitting me on camera) when I wouldn’t give her my car so she could go “work” (i.e. swing by her crack dealer’s place). She stayed away voluntarily for about a week or two before I found out about the crack usage; after that I told her she couldn’t come back and filed a police report for the domestic battery in order to protect myself and our son from her. Took me a while to admit to myself that I was stuck in an abusive relationship for 15+ years.
Well, you can have all the things you listed as being part of a ‘good life’ and still be in an awful relationship, or have problems that need dealing with. I’m not sure I’d brag quite like that about abandoning someone in a mental health crisis. Its at least sad isnt it?
Because to Cynics like us, 90% of life is shit. Happiness is a cheesecake brownie, or a 5 second orgasm, or a good round of a shooter video game. Life sucks, and it’s hard. We have it easier than any other human in the history of humanity. But we’re still human, and shit can still suck. Focus on the small, brief moments of pure joy and happiness.
Why do people play videos games? Or watch movies? Or eat their favorite food? Or listen to their favorite music? Or masturbate? Or play sports? Or whatever…
For the dopamine hit. Everyone does this. But some people, like people suffering from ADHD, or people who went through severe abuse, or whatever, have a major deficit of the “Feel Good” chemical in their brains, or severe trauma/PTSD. And when they find a way to boost the good stuff, they get “addicted.”
No one wants to be an addict, a slave to a substance/experience. But sometimes it’s a shortcut to not feeling absolutely miserable. And sometimes a healthy road to solving the problem is unavailable/unaffordable.
It says a lot about life broadly that any time we invent or devise some kind of system or chemical for eliminating pain, that substance instantly becomes so addicting that we can no longer manage life at all and it has to be regulated and locked away for our own good.
Life is pain. Even if you’ve gone numb to it, every moment hurts in one way or another. You just might not ever notice it until you experience the alternative.
I think this is what anti-natalists are going on about, that life is more painful than joyous, don’t bring more conscious beings into it.
I understand that premise, but I’d argue that there is more good than bad in life, that while the universe may not care about any of us, there are plenty of genuinely beautiful moments out there, even just walking around your local park.
Death is certain, maybe some should be permitted to exit life early, but there’s gotta be a way to show people nature’s beauty. I don’t really know where to go with this comment in truth. I just hope people in pain find genuine solace.