Had this friend who swears he was straight. But. He loved dicks, coz they’re “so aethetical” and dispised vajayjays coz “they’re disgusting axe-wounds”. When i dared saying he sounds more gay than straight he was furiously pissed and in the end quit the friendship coz I’m just “straightphobe” and seeing gays everywhere.

I didn’t really know - being a logical being - how to react to all of this. He was dead serious. Even offered to suck me off and got pissed that i declined due to not being bi or gay.