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-64 points

I literally don’t know of a single way to do that

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28 points

Looks like you should keep your mouth shut then maybe

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15 points

You cheer them up by telling them that at least they don’t have to deal with [insert bad present from an ex here] and she doesn’t have to buy any extra presents this year.

If that doesn’t work, you base it off of their exes’ behavior: for example if they got sloppy drunk, you say that at least she doesn’t need to DD/babysit this year. If they were loud, you say that at least she’s not going to suffer permanent hearing damage.

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14 points

Don’t feed the troll. This one is obvious.

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1 point

I only do it part time when I think sarcasm would be a little funny.

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25 points

That’s so very sad

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