malloc

Tell me that isn’t the name of a demon.

Casually wields Sothis’s spinal column

Some possibilities:

• The plant is poisonous to the touch, with its poison gradually turning affected animals’ bones into spiders. Once the spiders escape, they burrow into the ground, where new plants sprout.
• A specimen of an otherwise mundane species of plant, except that it was found growing on the moon’s surface. Also, its seeds are made of some unknown element with an atomic mass of 666.
• Digital analysis reveals that there is actually no plant in this image, the perception of it is entirely memetic, and also triggers a secondary effect: a tall humanoid figure covered in eyes that is now going to appear in your dreams.

When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left.

The first day of seven, the Moon’s Day did herald his wrath. On that first day of seven, dias irae, and on each Moon’s Day thereafter, in accordance with the fell oath, Lasagna shall be offered as atonement, to the one cloaked in orange, mane streaked with blackened coal.

- The Grimoire of Garfield

At first, in that light, I couldn’t tell if their eyes had pupils, but I realized they did. IMO it would make the orange cat and blue bear scarier if instead of pinprick pupils they just had full-white eyes. Pretty scary as-is, though. 👍

“I’m Edelgard von Hresvelg, and I approve this message.”

Here’s a little existential horror story to tell an elf:

When you stand in that presentation hall alongside the galaxy’s greatest scientists as they unveil the discovery of the first Black Dwarf Star, you will feel that existential dread begin to mount in your soul. The universe’s first gray hair signals what you already know, but up until now, have done your best to ignore: you will outlive everything.

Aeons will pass, and you will watch as humanity stretches thin and wide across an evaporating cosmos. In those final moments aboard the station orbiting the last known black hole, as the Habitat Control System’s voice coldly announces that the relativistic generators have run low on fuel, the mortals around you will accept their end with heartfelt, tearful goodbyes. That is their way. There once was a time you would have pitied them. Now, you envy them.

You envy them, even as the gravitational suspension array fails, and the sudden change in pressure from the ruptured hull of the last colony, buckling under its own gravity, ejects you and your crew into the faint glow of a faded accretion disc. The ethereal fire of matter and energy scorches your very being, as you spiral into the abyss.

You lose track of time as you sink into the singularity, somehow still alive. After what could just as easily have been an instant as an eternity, the heat returns in a final burst of Hawking Radiation, before you are exiled into the void of Heat Death, for the rest of eternity.

“…439059104575727262464195387 bottles of beer on the wall, (Graham’s Number) bottles of beer…”

You can’t remember what any of those words mean any more.

do not refer to me

…And that’s what we programmers call a memory leak!

That thumbnail looks like the sky is flipping off humanity lol