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I actually found that book and managed to download a copy. I’ll start reading it tomorrow.
I’ve definitely noticed times when I’ve been in each of these states. I’ll give breaking things down into “Thoughts, Feelings, Behavior” a try too.
Thanks again for all the advice and information, it’s been really helpful!
Thanks, I use most of these techniques too. The bottom-up process you mentioned for writing is really helpful for a lot of things. I used to write documentation for work, and writing things down as if I were explaining them to someone else, like you suggested, is a great way to see things as a whole. I’ve started using a journal in the same way, just collecting my thoughts and trying to put them all together. Exercise has been a game changer. I’ve started running in the mornings and evenings, as well as lifting weights. I hate to admit it, but the exercise people were right lol
No, not really. I’m somewhat of a recluse. There have been specific people at work who have been on the receiving end, but unless I was unmuted or something, they would never know about it.
I feel things a little too strongly sometimes, but I’ve found something that helps. Another commenter shared this with me. I still don’t understand all of it, but I think the part about ignoring emotions is related to my issue.
I’ve started keeping a journal, and whenever I feel overwhelmed, I write down whatever I’m feeling. If I remember, I also try to practice mindfulness. It’s only been two days, but I’ve used the journal at least a dozen times, and I can practice mindfulness anytime.
It actually works. I’ve been silent all day almost.
I’m still learning about what they are, and I also have ADHD, which complicates things. I usually don’t pay attention to how I’m feeling, and until recently, I used to just react without really thinking. I was reading about ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, and I can see that this is definitely contributing to my situation. It’s more about judgments and exclusions, and less about rejection and criticism. I don’t mind being made fun of; I just want to be accepted.
Thank you. This is important, but I need to process it.
My situation is a little different, but it’s similar to the end of a long-term relationship, and I went through nearly all of what you’ve described. A few months have passed, and I feel like I’m nearing the end of whatever this is. I also reacted strongly to something insignificant, like a basketball, before I realized I needed to address it. If it’s not too personal, could you give an example of what you mean by signs of being in hypoarousal and hyperarousal? I’ve noticed situations where I’ll freeze up if I feel judged, and I’ve also caught myself stimming (rocking side to side in my chair when I’m overstimulated or stressed). I haven’t been officially diagnosed yet, but I no longer have any doubts that I’m on the spectrum.
Don’t apologize, I do the exact same thing, and I knew you didn’t want to reply unless it was high-quality. What you posted was perfect. Thank you.
I’m in the same boat and really struggling with this. I have some unhealthy coping mechanisms that I didn’t realize were that bad or even related.
Like you, I have trouble getting the words out. My sentences become short and choppy because I can’t process my thoughts or fully understand what I’m feeling when it’s all happening. I didn’t even realize what was going on until a month or two ago, and I’m in my late 30s. It sounds like you’ve already tried writing things down. I just started doing that today, and it’s been incredibly helpful. Another thing I’ve found useful is mindfulness meditation. I almost never listen to my body, but with mindfulness, you sort of have to.
I didn’t realize how difficult it really is to communicate these things until I tried.
For me, it’s gym shorts and a T-shirt, usually in bright colors.
The shorts are typically 100% cotton, but I also have a couple of shirts made from merino wool, which are incredibly comfortable to wear.
