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mortido really bad. i can’t continue being unmedicated.
My week was very not good, sadly. I had to take my grandpa to the ER on Friday, and then I got broken up with Friday evening. Had a ten hour video shoot Saturday, just been pretty overwhelmed with work and home life in general. Things will work out ok, but this week has been a lot lol
I had heart palpitations for like 2 weeks but they finally stopped today, thankfully.
Cold and lonely. Ran out of my main anti-hypertensive+anti-anxiety med, now there’s nothing keeping my blood pressure high (as opposed to extremely high) unless I can smoke enough weed to do that. I don’t really like it enough to try very hard 🤷 Had some kinda emotional crash thing last night, figured out I’m afraid to exist. Especially without an easy way out it feels like a terrifying commitment I’m not ready for. Sounds odd I guess but I don’t pretend to be okay 🤷
Also, Minnesota’s medicaid stuff is ass-garbage. Just gimme a website where I can poke the buttons and get everything done instantly. Oklahoma managed it. Somehow here it takes months and a bunch of bullshit snail mail and phone calls and I still don’t have it fully set up (prescription coverage fuckingplease?!?) Grrrr!
Did I mention “cold and lonely?” Dunno if I’m even capable of feeling close to anycritter any more but bleeeh it hurts to not have anycritter I feel like I can yap at.
Anyway, back to days of daze. sarcastic “Wheee”
my car blew up so I am now fully homeless but hey, I got to take some cute pics of myself so it’s not all bad