Personally this doesn’t feel like true theyknew material, because this is one of those “this is how they had to advertise because nobody would allow them to say the real purpose of the items” rather than “suggestive thing presented as normal with a lot of rib-to-elbow action and stifled giggles behind the scenes, often hidden from management”
It’s one of those “it fits the literal definition but not the spirit” situations. Idk Maybe it’s just me.
It’ll never not be funny though
You’re right, Chief.
And that sort of thing had been commonplace since the Victorian times.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SScVqAytfHU&t=405
Video is geoblocked but I’m assuming that’s a hole for carrying your axe close to your groin?
Video is geoblocked
Wild guess, are you from the UK? Pretty much all QI full episodes are available on YT on random channel but they always have something like “not available in the UK” in the titles.
It’s an “electric jockstrap”
I’m gonna paste subtitles from that part. I tries editing the numbers away a bit but then couldn’t be arsed
00:06:52,786 --> 00:06:56,026 explain how an electric jockstrap works. 126 00:06:57,586 --> 00:07:00,306 Is there going to be a demonstration? 127 00:07:00,306 --> 00:07:01,857 Do you know, I kind of wish there were. 128 00:07:01,881 --> 00:07:04,244 - Is that what this is? - No. 129 00:07:07,268 --> 00:07:10,426 - That’s what this is. - Is it a warming thing, or…? 130 00:07:10,426 --> 00:07:13,106 An electric anything takes us into a period of time. 131 00:07:13,106 --> 00:07:16,146 - Galvanism. It’s Victorian, galvanism. - Galvan, exactly. 132 00:07:16,146 --> 00:07:18,626 Everybody thought electricity would cure everything, 133 00:07:18,626 --> 00:07:21,146 stimulate everything and achieve everything. 134 00:07:21,146 --> 00:07:23,826 And so at the back of every newspaper there was an electrical 135 00:07:23,826 --> 00:07:27,626 something, a galvanic bath, but these were electric jockstraps. 136 00:07:27,626 --> 00:07:30,466 Well, presumably, because they had all sorts of things to stop boys 137 00:07:30,466 --> 00:07:32,506 playing with themselves, it must have been… 138 00:07:32,506 --> 00:07:35,266 That would stop you, wouldn’t it? It would stop you, wouldn’t it? 139 00:07:35,266 --> 00:07:38,026 - If you had a shock in your pants. - No, I’m thinking it might be nice. 140 00:07:38,026 --> 00:07:38,881 - Yes. - Oh, really? 141 00:07:38,905 --> 00:07:40,946 You’re spot on. We men know that. 142 00:07:42,506 --> 00:07:45,506 Because there are certain code words in Victorian English. 143 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:49,626 “Nervous and general debility, lost vigour, decline, 144 00:07:49,626 --> 00:07:52,186 and the whole train of gloomy attendants,” 145 00:07:52,186 --> 00:07:54,706 was standard code for impotence. 146 00:07:54,706 --> 00:07:58,226 Enter the Heidelberg electric belt. 147 00:07:58,226 --> 00:08:00,506 There it is. 148 00:08:00,506 --> 00:08:02,306 - It’s a bit high up, isn’t it? - Yes. 149 00:08:02,306 --> 00:08:03,626 Oh, I see, so actually there’s the thing down there. 150 00:08:03,626 --> 00:08:08,186 That’s really kind of buzzing away in the important area. 151 00:08:08,186 --> 00:08:12,066 And that is actually going to cause you to, well, I’m afraid 152 00:08:12,066 --> 00:08:16,546 the phrase is probably embarrassing, they advise “seminal economy”. 153 00:08:16,546 --> 00:08:18,700 - They’re advising against… - Is that with easyJet? 154 00:08:18,724 --> 00:08:19,466 Yeah. 155 00:08:21,146 --> 00:08:22,306 They’re advising against 156 00:08:22,306 --> 00:08:26,786 “wantonly jettisoning too much nervous substance.” 157 00:08:26,786 --> 00:08:29,426 - Which basically… - Is that what they called it? 158 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:32,786 That’s code for semen. In other words, it’s essentially a sex toy. 159 00:08:32,786 --> 00:08:34,786 - “Wantonly jettisoning.” - It is… 160 00:08:34,786 --> 00:08:38,306 Don’t wantonly jettison your nervous substance. 161 00:08:38,306 --> 00:08:40,786 I like the idea of nervous semen just coming out going… 162 00:08:43,186 --> 00:08:46,066 He’s quite camp. Perhaps he’s having problems with his virility 163 00:08:46,066 --> 00:08:49,666 - cos he’s sleeping with the wrong sex. - Well, it might be that. 164 00:08:49,666 --> 00:08:53,066 But there genuinely was an item, as you can see, hugely advertised, 165 00:08:53,066 --> 00:08:54,546 there were lots of different… 166 00:08:54,546 --> 00:09:00,090 So is it designed then to lift the dormant chap or to de-nervify the semen? 167 00:09:00,114 --> 00:09:02,266 It’s basically designed saying, 168 00:09:02,266 --> 00:09:05,786 “Would you like to enjoy the experience of a little bit 169 00:09:05,786 --> 00:09:08,826 of a tingling down there that maybe has disappeared?” 170 00:09:08,826 --> 00:09:10,226 But it probably was just like, 171 00:09:10,226 --> 00:09:12,506 “That’s a damn good thing to take to a hotel room.” 172 00:09:12,506 --> 00:09:14,141 Why have they gone out of fashion? 173 00:09:14,165 --> 00:09:16,186 - I know. - Are these still for sale? 174 00:09:16,186 --> 00:09:18,946 I feel like if Ann Summers did them, you could see, 175 00:09:18,946 --> 00:09:21,706 not in the upstairs bit, the downstairs bit of Ann Summers… 176 00:09:21,706 --> 00:09:22,846 Tell me about this, Jason, because I… 177 00:09:22,846 --> 00:09:25,026 Upstairs is like, just like chocolate willies and that. 178 00:09:25,026 --> 00:09:28,586 Downstairs… Someone’s going to get hurt, Stephen. 179 00:09:31,346 --> 00:09:33,378 Really? I’ve never been in an Ann Summers. 180 00:09:33,402 --> 00:09:34,586 That’s weird. You’d think it would be 181 00:09:34,586 --> 00:09:36,020 the other way round, you’d have to go upstairs in order to… 182 00:09:36,044 --> 00:09:38,307 No, you come in at ground floor level. 183 00:09:38,331 --> 00:09:40,546 I’m only going off our nearest 12 branches. 184 00:09:40,546 --> 00:09:42,186 Yes, right. 185 00:09:43,306 --> 00:09:45,506 But, yeah, that’s the normal one. 186 00:09:45,506 --> 00:09:47,666 And then you sort of pop downstairs, you know, anniversary, or whatever… Good gracious. But the other thing about that is you got ten days’ free trial. 189 Wow! 190 I don’t know if you can see, but it’s actually printed there. 191 What if you send it back and it goes to somebody else? 192 That’s what I’m worried about with the free trial. 193 I know, exactly. You’re using a used one. 194 It is going to get much more acceptable and decent this programme, I promise you, as we move on.
Contoured to use comfortably around eyes, brows, chin and other parts of the body
Wasn’t this supposed to be a facial massager, sir?
Two C batteries? That thing is a beast.
I actually wish more devices used C and D batteries as those last longer.
I especially hate when a device uses AAA batteries when AA would easily fit.
My stylus uses AAAA batteries which was the same exact sound I made when AAAs didn’t fit inside.
Also fun fact inside of a 9V is a bunch of AAAAs you can pop out because who the fuck keeps AAAAs on hand
D batteries are fine, but C batteries are not common here. We have 2 cat feeders that use 4 C batteries. If they are empty I need to order new ones on the interwebs, they just don’t have them in stores here. We now have same spare of course. But pretty annoying the first time.
But maybe if they are just in more stuff I can buy them in a store here.
Not really. Things don’t magically get better just because time has passed. Efficiency reaches a plateau, and the laws of thermodynamics prevent any further improvements.
Since it’s a battery operated device, they’re almost certainly using brushed motors. Those are less efficient than brushless, but brushed DC motors are cheap and easy to run from a DC source. The complex electronics to run brushless motors only got cheap in the last decade or so, and there’s still plenty of sex toy vibrators that use brushed because it’s easy and doesn’t take much space in the device.
The difference isn’t even that big. About 75-80% efficient for brushed, and 85-90% efficient for brushless. The extra complication of electronics isn’t always worthwhile even today. The basic mechanics of this stuff was invented over a century ago and was all but perfected decades before OP’s advertisement ever existed. It can’t be better than 100% efficiency, and it’s already pretty close to that. Unless someone comes up with a really clever design that gets brushless efficiency with little to no additional electronics, there’s not much improvement to be seen.
Batteries, OTOH, have improved by leaps since then.
The size of the battery only adds capacity, not power. You gotta increase voltage.
It also increases the amount of current you can draw from the battery at once (the C rating).
Would increase current increase the motors intensity? I guess the motor speed wouldn’t increase, but when you start using the motor, the current would help sustain the speed.
Actually not really. Even the D type batteries would have smaller circumference than the average.
Sorry, I’m so American that the only thing I can see is a bullet.