38 points

“Thou shall not kill”…

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25 points

The Ten Suggestions

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9 points

I’m stealing that

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7 points

I’m sure I stole it from somewhere. I doubt I came up with it.

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17 points

Unless God commands you to, of course. Who decides what God wants? Well, fuck you, heretic.

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4 points

better translation is “you shall not commit murder”

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3 points

That commandment died long ago in the US.

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3 points

The commandmens were a little vague on the subject of kneecapping, though.

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-2 points

Not every gun is used for killing.

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29 points

“WARNING! This is not a gun free zone! WE ARE ARMED! Any attempt to disrupt or harm will be dealt with in an overwhelming display of force!”

You know. An enterprising fellow could probably make off with a lot of firearms stored improperly in vehicles.

Also. “Overwhelming force” sounds like a threat. The kind of threat that gives me reasonable belief that when you get angry, you get shoot-y. Probably want to take that down before it leads to evidence of premeditation.

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1 point

That sign should be on the front door of America, and American interests abroad.

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-3 points

It’s just a beware of dog sign, except the dogs have better teeth.

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14 points

You realize that if you have a beware of dog sign and your dog attacks someone, suddenly it becomes a “you knew you had an aggressive dog”- even if it was “just a joke, bro”?

They might think it’s just a joke, but if an incident happens, lawyers will have a field day with that.

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1 point

Maybe more teeth.

Not sure about better. Nor about skilled in the use of said “teeth”.

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14 points

Right of admission reserved

Truly a church in the image of Christ. 🙄

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10 points

“Thou shalt kill”

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6 points

I guess when Jesus said turn the other cheek he meant shoot em instead

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