Have deep experience in 3 different job fields and, in 2 years, learn 5 languages.

19 points

You must know double Java.

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7 points

No, that’s in order. You must know those languages in that order, sort of like a russian nesting doll of experience.

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5 points

Java++

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2 points

Amazing, i didn’t even notice this.

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21 points

Be familiar with NoSql: like Mysql, postgreSQL, SequelSqlSQL, and Memdb.

Be fluent in 5 programming languages, 3 spoken languages, and be able to read Linear A, B, and C.

Reminds me of when I was first out of school, and seeing jobs for C#.NET that needed 5 years of experience back when the entire platform was 3 years old.

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10 points

Be familiar with NoSql: like Mysql, postgreSQL, SequelSqlSQL, and Memdb.

well, the definition of “NoSQL” was changed to stand for “Not Only SQL” some while back because of how many nosql DBs started incorporating SQL (and how many SQL RDBMS started adding nosql features)

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9 points

NoSQL was only ever a marketing term. Things like Mongo are what’s been known as KVSes (Key-Value Stores). Mongo basically just rode a hype wave into extremely large amounts of funding but predating it by at least a decade was libmemcached, which lacks the “relational light” functionality that Mongo added but is a more resilient version of the core concept.

Technologies like Redis actually ended up adding significant innovation but they ended up mostly eschewing the NoSQL term anyway.

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4 points

Hah! Of course it is, I didn’t know that but words stopped meaning anything in tech ages ago and reality is finally catching up. Makes sense though, Azure and AWS both are webs of different data stores and interconnections now.

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16 points

Salary: $65k/yr

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17 points

No remote work, location: Bay Area.

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12 points
*

Yearly bonus: $5 coupon for McDonald’s

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2 points

Valid only in Altoona, PA.

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9 points

I’m currently looking for work in this area and I have seen very similar postings, 3 years experience and for £25000 to £29000.

It’s bloody mental, and they list it as junior roles and then list everything.

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4 points

Fuuuuck that

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46 points

“We want a senior developer at junior pay.”

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44 points

I forget what the exact quote is, but…

Wanted, candidate with:

 The wisdom of a 50 year old.

 The experience of a 40 year old.

 The drive of a 30 year old.

 The pay of a 20 year old.
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18 points

"Our rockstar developer quit, because they had to fulfill too many roles and you get to be their replacement

…at junior pay."

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2 points

rockstar

developer

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10 points

1 Year and many poor design decisions later: “Why is our app so slow??”

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3 points

We had a great product, then we axed the great staff. Of course, we sold the company before the product went to shit.

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7 points

This is what happens when the lead sends hr “here’s everything I care about and need on my team. A junior to intermediate candidate should be familiar with all, and experienced with one or two.”

Then hr says “yep sure, expert in all”

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4 points

The most accurate take. I honestly agree with most of the people here saying this isn’t unreasonable when these aren’t requirements meant to be met at 100%. But honestly they are written so poorly and reed like you need all of them. You hit the nail on the head. Bad requirements sent to the dev lead, unclear details about what kind of candidates can fill the role, and poorly written job requirements.

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