Before I start, yes I know this is my fault for being cheap and I’m an idiot for using Apple products.

Now…

Some time ago, I realized that the only way I could make sure my kid would get up in the morning since she refuses to use an alarm clock was to shine a bright light on her. Since she has apparently become a nudist while in her room, this means I need a way to turn that light on without opening her door. In comes the smart bulb. I also decide to get a second for my office light because what the hell, but I’m not really interested in any other home automation.

iOS’ Homekit does not play well with many smart bulbs, so you have to be careful about what you buy- as I found out.

The first ones we got were Sylvania and it did say Homekit on the box, and they worked fine, except they were Bluetooth and I sometimes wasn’t able to get close enough for it to work. I kept at it for a few weeks, but I finally decided to spend a little extra on the WiFi bulbs.

So the first ones I bought at Menards, where I saved big money. It said there was an iOS app, but it did not say Homekit on the side. I assumed. Stupid me. No, if you want to do things like have it work with Siri, you have to do a bunch of individual commands and they are slow. No way. You also can’t put it in Control Center to turn it on and off without using Siri. That only works with Homekit.

Next, I decided to order some online, but since I’m poor and cheap, I decided to save some money.

This is why you become at least marginally computer-savvy, kids. Although it will involve a great deal of swearing:

I got a decent deal on a couple of bulbs from what was obviously a Chinese company on Amazon. It said they were Homekit compatible and the reviews said they worked fine.

So, I order them. They come in a couple of days later. “AIYATO” brand smart bulbs. Maybe? I don’t remember the name. The instructions are two lines and suggest you just need Homekit, which you didn’t from the Sylvania bulb, you also need an installation app. But what the hell. Tried a few times. Didn’t work.

Clearly I need an app. So I go to the app store. No AIYATO app listed. Okay, I’ll go back to the order and see if anyone talks about how to get it to work in the reviews. Wait a second… it says the bulb is DoHome brand. I wonder if THEY have an app?

Yes. Yes they do.

I download the app, do the stupid registration thing so that China now has access to everything I own, and it tells me to look for the name of the bulb brand as a Wifi access point. There are only two access points available. My router, and another one which starts with CozyLife. That’s the only thing it could possibly be. So I join it and tell the app.

It doesn’t work. That’s not the right Wifi name. ARGH. I try a couple of times. I do a hard reset of the light like the horrible Engrish troubleshooting says to. Still no. Finally I think: maybe there is a CozyLife app? Oh. There is. Download and install that? I create a new login for the Chinese to have access to everything I own and…

It installs the light? Yes! Homekit installs the light after I annoyingly have to unscrew the bulb, take a picture of the QR code on the side and then screw it back in? Yes!

Does it work with Siri? Yes!

Does it work with Siri on my watch? Well… nothing’s perfect. But it works with the home app on my watch. Close enough.

But yes. Clearly the same Chinese smart bulb company has at least three different names and I had to figure out the right name to use but that was never made clear anywhere, along with instructions on the box that did not work.

Now the really scary part: they also, according to their app, make a smart space heater.

8 points

Not specific to Apple… it’s the same thing for Android… buy a “brand A” bulb, nowhere to find the app, install another app for “brand B” and it works… SmartLife, SmartThing, ECO plugs (this one was hard to find, it is to control my WiON plug), Sylvania Smart Home (for the bluetooth ones), Tapo (I had Kasa too but TP-Link made them work with Tapo, one less app!!!), Geeni, etc, all kinds of apps… and some stuf like the Sylvania BT bulb can be flashed with their own firmware, the google home firmware, the amazon alexa firmware etc so if you have the wrong one, it half-ass pairs and does not work, you have to toggle its power 5 times to repair with the app etc

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5 points

The 5-time power toggle seems really sensitive too. You have to do it within a window that’s not too long and not too short.

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9 points

All of the cheap Chinese devices are Tuya, which is a Chinese company which iirc the CCP controls.

The only reason you should buy a Tuya device is if you’re going up flash it with an open source firmware.

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5 points

Now the really scary part: they also, according to their app, make a smart space heater.

It recognizes if you are in space and heats your ass?

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2 points

That would be cool, but no. That would probably result in far fewer fires.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_heater

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10 points

Basically in my experience, when it comes to smart lights it’s generally just worth springing the extra for Philips Hue (and using the hub, not just in Bluetooth mode) unless you want to waste your time and money with other brands. Nothing else seems to be remotely as reliable and easy to work with—and I have zero patience for having to perform tech support on my house lighting.

I’m glad to hear you got your bulbs working though

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2 points

Thanks. That agrees with everything I read. Unfortunately they’re twice the price. But when this cheap Chinese crap inevitably conks out in six months, I’ll hopefully be able to afford the investment in the Hue bulbs.

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22 points

Throw those bulbs away. They’re likely Tuya bulbs, and everything Tuya is a major security vulnerability. Worse than TikTok

Go with TP-Link. Their products work well, work with home kit, and work with things like home assistant. They’re also creating matter devices now.

Also, I’d recommend getting a smart light switch instead of a smart bulb since the Led controller in the bulb is what will fail first. But, I get that this isn’t an option for a lamp, or if your overhead light and fan are tied together.

For the lamp, a smart outlet would work, and for the fan you can probably rig up a Shelly relay at the fan so you don’t have to do a drop for the fan control cable (if it has that capability).

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-1 points

I am sure that’s true, but it’s what I could afford to invest in for the time being, but I also doubt it will work for long. And there’s really not much China could get out of me what with me being poor.

Also, there might be upsides.

Hey, maybe if the CCP takes control of my house they can figure out a way to stop my heat pump from freezing over every winter.

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1 point

Second for TP Link. I’ve been on TP Tapo lights for the last year and they’ve been pretty painless. Amazon puts them on sale pretty often. I mainly use them as a wake up light and to turn on the inside lights when I’m carrying in stuff at night.

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3 points

I really wish when people say stuff like this, I don’t have to resort to simply believe what they say at face value because they provide something like a fucking link or an article I can read to back up what they say.

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1 point
*

My hobby is designing smart home systems and building my own smart devices, as well as being a cyber security expert in my day job, so I’m actually a primary source.

Plus, don’t rely on strangers on the internet to spoon feed you sources. It’s pretty easy to do your own research (which is how I learned what I know. If I’m dubious of a claim, I research it myself, which is why I possess the wealth of knowledge I do.

But you can easily find the security risks posed by Tuya with light googling.

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5 points
*

There are only two CVEs related to Tuya and both are related to only one of their camera products. Their protocol has yet to be exploited. If there are zero days, then this is the case for literally everything and your statement is useless.

Again, please post something for us all to read, or all this stuff you are saying here is worthless nonsense.

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3 points

Even better, Shelly. Their devices have optional cloud connectivity, but also have a local API. they’re compatible with home assistant and their bluetooth sensors use the BTHome standard, which works beautifully with home assistant as well.

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3 points

Glad you got it to work eventually. I never liked smart bulbs. I use smart switches instead (Meross works really well with HomeKit). Set the lamp’s on/off switch to the on position and plug it into the smart switch. The smart switch can be connected to HomeKit anywhere in the house. You can set it up in the kitchen, then move it to your daughter’s room.

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4 points
*

I could see that, but being able to make the light strobe when she still refuses to get up gives it an advantage.

I want to be as annoying as possible until she agrees to get a damn alarm clock.

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2 points
*

I legitimately asked my dad to buy an airhorn at one point while I was still living at home (only used a few times, once with a cat sleeping on me; I was VERY lucky not to have been clawed). I have (and still do occasionally) shut alarms off in my sleep.

I am just very hard to wake up and keep awake for the first hour or two if a day.

I think the strobing lights idea is genius

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