Feeling the need to urinate, I went in to the appropriate room and found the big black cauldron that people are meant to piss in on the floor next to a fireplace. As I got going I noticed that the room wasn’t empty, and that I was standing right next to a table for two where a man and his wife were trying to eat dinner. “Excuse me sir, didn’t see you there” I apologized. They looked unhappy. As I continued, everyone else in the restaurant turned to look at me. As if I was the one doing something weird.

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