Depends on the situation.
Currently? 40 pound box of cake mix I’m probably going to launch at my store manager.
My cat. Everything else in my room brings me either misery or a feeling of meh. Cat brings joy, which is difficult for me to obtain.
Vibrator.
For almost everyone it’s gonna be the phone we’re reading this on.
The toilet. Lost count of the number of times this has saved me from getting dysentery or something and it’s so convenient when it just pushes the shit away from my house and I never have to see or smell it again. I almost feel bad that I repay it for all its done by repeatedly shitting in it.