I didn’t realize Siri and the cats were conspiring. Yesterday I went into the living room to investigate a ruckus and found one of my cats sitting on the couch while the home pod in the window sill was playing Mumford and Sons.
This started in 2011, when cats killed Jobs. Tim Cook is not a real person but a mere avatar operated by cats.
“Siri, how long has this been going on?”
I mean, “Son of Sam” was about a man who became a serial killer after being told to by a dog so I can see why cats would like it.
You’d think it would be a cat telling people to kill. Or at least knock shit off the table. Son of Sam could have just been some guy who went into peoples houses and broke stuff.
I mean, “I’m only happy when it rains” should be the national anthem for Catland.
Better check your order history lol
"Palette of tuna? One gross order of feathers on a stick? Premium, Extra Fancy catnip?
– Oh good, nothing amiss here!"
