tl:dr; India is a terrible place to live in, Indians lead miserable lives and are not even aware of it, they are facing many other problems and they are not aware of that too, they are delusional and still stuck in the past. Being born poor in India signs you up for difficult to conquer problems because of the culture you grow up in, Human development happens at the pace of a tortoise here, India is a curse, now how can I get rid of the curse and lead a fulfilling and happy life?
I see the middle class Indians and while their life is better than mine, it’s nothing to write home about. They are doing ok, they are not great and I am lower middle class, even if I try my best, I don’t think I will be rewarded well for that. Indians start life at 0 while other developed countries are at an average of 4, Indians just dream of the 4, they just want that 4! That’s their life, they pursue their life, whole lives, just to get a decent life! I don’t want to do this, this doesn’t excite me! Help! What can I do? P.S: I am a 22yo who is worthless and who has a worthless (0 value) degree from a useless Indian university, how can I improve my life!
If you want to read why I think being born in India is a multi-generational curse, carry on reading, otherwise, this was enough!
- Indian educational system is garbage and it doesn’t create high-value labor, it produces unremarkable individuals.
- Indian infrastructure is a joke with everything built by the government being of the lowest quality.
- Indian is one of most corrupt countries in the world (top 10-20 maybe).
- People are extremely tribal and in the absence of resources for development, Indians will try to barter what little resources there are along community lines (reservations) than force the government to try and create more economic opportunities.
- Private Industry from foreign companies are a sigh of relief but due to above mentioned reasons (low-skilled labor, bad economy, bad infrastructure, stupid policies and Kafkaesque bureaucracy) most companies justifiably don’t want to set up shop in India and this exacerbates the economy problem.
- Indians clamor for Western attention and approval, most of them do realize India is nothing to write home about but they don’t understand the extent of the problem. They are way too proud of minuscule achievements. They are even less aware of how the culture that prevails now will produce nothing but failure. They lose it when anyone of Indian decent does anything noteworthy and they are way too proud to accept the problem. This is the reason why youtubers love to praise India, they know what works in India. The government takes advantage of this and calls everyone who dares to criticize the country or their government as anti-national. Many journalists have been jailed for reporting facts. We never learn and we are committed to never learning! Even when Indians leave India, they try to create a mini-India abroad and not go out of their cultural comfort zone.
- We are creepy! I was creepy, I am a little creepy still, I had to work A LOT to be able to be normal around women, that trope, it’s real and it’s just saddening in the highest degree. Indians don’t socialize with opposite sex a lot and it’s discouraged and sometimes forbidden in this culture to do so, so you create adults who can’t really talk comfortably towards women. Took me a long time to realize the problem and solve it, the past me disgusts the present me!
Edit: 8. Indians lack any kind of civic responsibility. They throw garbage everywhere, they spit pan (tobacco stuff) anywhere and everywhere, open defecation isn’t as big of a problem as people pissing in the streets but it still remains a problem, I have done this too (When I was little). I can’t get my parents to not throw off plastic off the train no matter how much I explain then why it’s wrong in multiple ways! Most Indian cities look like a garbage dumb than a place to live. If people at least had kept our streets clean and acknowledge the problems facing this country instead of being proud of mediocrity, I would have been been more than willing to try to turn things for the better here, but they don’t!!
I can write a book about this, but for the sake of your time and mine, I will stop.
I have realized one thing after being born here, it’s irredeemable! It won’t get drastically better. I just don’t know what to do about it and that is why I am asking you for advice!
There are also some India-specific comms where you may find people who’d commiserate.
On a personal level? Leaving really is the best option. Unless you have a good support network there, you’ll never really be able to get out of the cycle. I’m not Indian but I moved from my similar 3rd world country to a 1st world country. It was hard no doubt, and will probably be a little harder for you depending on the country and how many of your countrymen are trying to get in (i.e. Indians in the US wait a decade or more to get permanent residency). You can also try the education route if you can afford it. Another option as well is moving to maybe another country that doesn’t have to be a top 1st world destination. You can maybe check out southeast asia and see what opportunities are there.
Just a thought, but several of your anecdotes could describe 19th-century Europe, England in particular. Obviously India today is far more advanced than Victorian England, but still, is it possible that these are just normal growing pains for a country?
Things change slowly, then all at once. We are currently facing the same problems that Europe, the US, Japan and China faced and overcame.
Also, have you considered moving to a different part of India? Not all regions face the same issues. The northeast is a lot less creepy and a lot more civic-minded. The west is more industrialised and ‘developed’. The south has better educational systems, and so on.
I live in a ok place right now, but no matter where I go, I can’t deny that I am working my ass off just to afford the basic stuff and paying 4 months or more of taxes for nothing much!
For things to change all at once, Indians need to stop deluding themselves into thinking that they are this great country and every problem India faces is due to the outside influence or due to minorities. I don’t see that happening anytime soon. If India knew what the problem was like the Japanese did after the West forced it to open it’s waters for trade long ago, Indians would have stood a chance, but we don’t, we are in a really bad shape and many don’t know that we are in a bad shape and those who know are not focusing on the problem, rather they are focusing on Mughals, Muslims and serveral other external factors, they are not looking inwards.
Man, that went a different way than I thought it would. I read the title and was expecting some Scooby-Doo-type shit.
As for your issue, I think you have two choices:
- Emigrate
- Become an activist/politician and work on issues #3 and #8. Fix those, and the rest will follow.
- It is the only option, but I am not sure how, as in, I don’t have great grades and there are millions of Indians waiting to immigrate! It’s a shitshow tbh, a friend went to London for a business degree, still unemployed and stuck in debt! The desperation to get out among people is extremely depressing.
edit: How can one try to get out? Get good really good in their field?
Also, when Indians try to find happiness in mediocrity, we use a phrase, “India is a not for beginners”, Schooby-Doo-typa curse is easy, this shit has expert level difficulty.
Hello friend. Indian American here. My parents immigrated here, and their ticket in was education. I understand your grades aren’t great, and I also acknowledge that my parents did come from middle-to-upper-class privilege.
I work for an IT company who employees (not outsources) individuals in India. Several of them have left India to come to the U.S. or Canada. For all of them, education has always been the way out. They knew they wanted out, so they grinded hard in the short-term, and applied aggressively abroad for graduate-level education.
Find a niche in something that does interest you. It seems you are very socioeconomically aware, consider something in such a realm that makes you stand out (yes, I understand this is easier said than done, especially in a nation of 1.3…1.4? billion).
Saying that, also understand that STEM-related expertise areas are much more sought after. So it might not be a bad idea to focus on that side and/or diversify.
I won’t contest a lot of what you said about India - much of that is accurate. Some of that is more cynical than necessary. But change is slow and it would be wrong of me to tell you to stay and change a nation in a region notoriously resistant to change. Unless you’re the next coming of Barack Obama charisma, in which case, please help change India, hahaha.
You’re young, you have plenty of time. So don’t feel burdened not finding a spark at this era in your life. My Mom immigrated here only after marriage, when she was 28. The coworkers I’ve mentioned have all been in their late 20s or early-to-mid 30s.
I want to add - you’re not worthless. Don’t devalue yourself needlessly based on the decrees of an unfair and unjust society or uncaring peers and family.
Saying that, also understand that STEM-related expertise areas are much more sought after. So it might not be a bad idea to focus on that side and/or diversify.
I tried this, failed once, trying again! :)
You’re young, you have plenty of time. So don’t feel burdened not finding a spark at this era in your life. My Mom immigrated here only after marriage, when she was 28
Thank you very much! I will turn 23 soon, I will try my best to get out and make something of myself and even if I can’t get out, I will try and live meaningfully here (PS: I posted here, because I thought that was very fucking difficult)
Also, thank you very much! I wish you well as you do to me! :)
Take nursing, there more than 2 countries I know that have easy entry if you are trained in nursing. And nursing may require study as well, but if your foundations are weak in Stem specially physics and maths, you can still do nursing. Do nursing and get a job easily in UK, Australia, Singapore, New Zealand, etc. There might be others too that have easy immigration for nursing.
