I’ve been thinking lately about why, in debates (usually) about highly emotional topics, so many people seem unable to acknowledge even minor wrongdoings or mistakes from “their” side, even when doing so wouldn’t necessarily undermine their broader position.
I’m not here to rehash any particular political event or take sides - I’m more interested in the psychological mechanisms behind this behavior.
For example, it feels like many people bind their identity to a cause so tightly that admitting any fault feels like a betrayal of the whole. I’ve also noticed that criticism toward one side is often immediately interpreted as support for the “other” side, leading to tribal reactions rather than nuanced thinking.
I’d love to hear thoughts on the psychological underpinnings of this. Why do you think it’s so hard for people to “give an inch” even when it wouldn’t really cost them anything in principle?
To admit that you’re wrong would be to admit that your view is the weaker one.
Perhaps I’m playing in to the scenario OP is describing but I’d argue that being wrong (let’s assume for this example it’s provably, objectively wrong) isn’t necessarily weakness, sometimes it’s just incorrectness.
i’m possibly drawing a pedantic line between weakness (a potentially valid, but weaker argument) vs incorrectness ( an argument that is provably, objectively incorrect ).
Perhaps i’m just describing the difference between subjective and objective arguments … hmmm, not sure
Lemmy is worse than reddit in almost every measureable way. The reason I haven’t gone back to reddit is purely out of principle and it’s not a principle if it’s not costing you anything.
Damn your opinions suck lmao. Were you the reason Blahaj defederated from feddit.uk?
Cuz it would be funny if one user could annoy a community so much that they decide to defedreate the entire instance.
Also the above comment being right next to:
Longest continuous edging streak. Hell, I might already hold that record anyway.
Perfect example of a reddit user lol.
What do you get out of going around insulting complete strangers? People being intentionally mean online is honestly baffling to me.
Because people go into these debates online to prove themselves right. They have no intention from changing their opinion from the begining. They only want to prove the others wrong. They have already a defense build up that discredits whatever others says. They don’t care about communication or understanding others they only care about representing their opinions the best way possible. Worst part, the harder they “lose” these debates, the deeper their believes in their opinion grows as they feel the need to defend their believes.
As a tip, if someone wants to debate you on a topic, don’t engage or engange in a communicative & cheritable manner trying to understand them and why they hold their believes. Try to move their opinions a little from their side “I get exactly what you mean, but how abou this and that. Have you considered these possibilities?” Let them reach the right conclussion and not you force them into a conclussion. I know it’s way harder than just straight up debating them but way more productive if you truly care about a topic and want to engage with them in a debate.
You have to do the heavy lifting, not them IMO.
For example the why should we help lazy people?!! I wonder what should we actuallydo with them then? Like you’re too lazy to work should we let them die because of their “stupidness” and errors they made?
Never changed anyone’s mind right away but you get to talk about the underlying reasons why they hate “lazy” people, and it’s often something (shocker) that has nothing to do with “lazy” people.
For example.
Edit: I use the rightwing trope here just as an example. I’m the laziest person I know!
I’m not convinced ‘lazy’ people exist. Everyone I’ve ever known to be lazy is either ADHD, depressed, or anxious. It’s a symptom of an unhealthy mind, not an inherent trait anyone possesses.
This is my experience as well. Anecdotally, at least. Lately I’ve been slowly putting together a community of friends, and my anxiety and depression have been dropping like crazy. Between that and the self-esteem boost I’ve been getting from finally starting hrt, I’m actually starting to feel competent enough to tackle things like getting a job, moving out (I’m gonna go looking at rental properties with a friend tomorrow), going grocery shopping, things like that.
God, I’ve always wanted to be able to just do something so plain as going grocery shopping for myself.
I can also tell that the anxiety causes a lot of issues with my motivation from the fact that my wonderful mom always throws worst-case scenarios at me whenever I try to become more independent. She’s been throwing the entire warehouse at me lately because I’ve been talking about how I’m moving out with a friend. My excitement has been turning to dread despite my friend’s reassurance that they’ll catch me if I fall; and as a result my motivation and ability to get out of bed has been plummeting.
But… Yeah. Anecdotally, it’s not laziness, it’s being anxious, overwhelmed, overstimmed, depressed, feeling lonely (I mean, what’s the point in doing anything if no one cares?) and so forth.
For sure. From my experience of having kid on spectrum, dealing with it and learning about how to help him (ok, the wife did most of the work there), we came to conclusion that almost all people have either ADHD or autistic traits, some even both. People we know that have ADHD traits are almost all a mess, add some shitty parenting or being prone to addiction and you have a recipe for disaster.
I’m not here to rehash any particular political event or take sides
checks post history out of curiosity oh.
To quote myself here:
I’ve also noticed that criticism toward one side is often immediately interpreted as support for the “other” side, leading to tribal reactions rather than nuanced thinking.
