transcript
A book with the title "I didn’t touch the computer, it just stopped working And Other Hilarious Jokes you Can Tell Someone from the IT Department.
You didn’t change anything?
No.
Where do you use it?
On my lap in the den.
When was the last time you vacuumed?
???
(Time to disassemble and apply compressed air…)
Have you ever walked a trading floor with IT? The horror stories… “That guy didn’t know what I meant by CD drive until I showed him and he said 'oh! The coffee mug holder?? '” or “no, really, look, just took a bump right under the desk” or better “under that desk? Had to swap machines… rotting barf from God knows when”
“It was working yesterday!” Is my favourite.
Things usually are working right before they stop working.
Why is it that cars breaking down has been normalised as just the natural behaviour of vehicles and then you ask the mechanic for help but computers break down and people act like IT personally came into your office to take a piss through the vent directly onto the motherboard?
Just put in a ticket. SLA is 3 days, see you in 2 weeks, but only because your boss got involved. God I hate the IT department.
As someone working in the IT department, I can tell you a secret:
We can sense when someone doesn’t appreciate us and we let them wait longer on purpose 🙂
Story time: I’ve had my work laptop replaced three times in the past two years because of persistent crashes under load. We tried replacing a lot of stuff, uninstalled all kinds of software etc., nothing helped. Turns out they’d remotely installed some utility about five years ago that controls fan speeds. That has been installed on each new machine because it was in my profile. When I checked, I found out that this thing hadn’t been updated in three years and was likely not compatible with my current hardware. Uninstalled it, never had problems since. So yeah, that was fun. At least I got a new laptop out of it.
