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My android phone and Linux computers all still want reboots after updates…

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Linux only needs a reboot if you want to update the kernel, normally.

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but in that case you can often kexec to restart linux faster, skipping the actual BIOS/UEFI boot.

also, some distros offer live patching of kernel code for $$$

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You don’t need to pay money for live patching.
They really just make you pay for having them do it for you.

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