I feel so isolated, so depressed and anxious whenever I think of things such as getting my GED or finally heading out to go to a dentist and get my teeth fixed. Or hanging out with my worthless, POS problematic family. I have no idea why. I know I’m not smart enough for the GED and I fear things going wrong. I just wanna get it done in just one or a few days. I just want to rest and live without a diploma since I believe I sorta have average intelligence as I was told before. I don’t really have college plans cause I have no interest in anything, and I know there’s some colleges out there that don’t require a diploma or similar.
I just really wish I could pay someone to take it for me or do it in a way that doesn’t take a long time or just bypass it. I don’t even feel like living.
Most important is to not get hung up on some image of what you “should” do. See if you are capable of improving yourself for 15 minutes per day, exact, with a stopwatch.
A first 15 minute session might just be a best effort of assembling study material.
Then see how it goes: Can you learn something new during that time? If so, you can do it, and it’s just a matter of time.
What motivates me is that after those 15 minutes I’ll be smarter than I have ever been before. You can also do 25 minutes if you feel it.
I have done great at times, long ago, to study something new. Most times it didn’t work out, though. One of my most toxic thoughts is: I should basically know this and it shouldn’t take long, I’ll just skim through the material. No, real progress happens when I set aside a brief moment to learn just this one little basic thing, but for real, with taking notes, practising if applicable. Turn that into a daily habit, and it’s really powerful.
