OTTAWA – A smug man from Canada wasted no time this morning chastising Americans for re-electing terrifying liar and felon Donald Trump, despite the fact that he plans to vote for terrifying liar and asshole Pierre Poilievre in the next Canadian election.
Matt Hunter, a 36-year-old barista, took time away from attending a Poilievre rally to rant about how stupid Americans were for falling for Trump’s fascist bullshit.
“I just can’t believe that someone could look at a petty asshole running on slogans, lies, and faux outrage and think, ‘Yeah, this guy will be good for the country,’” Hunter laughed, taking a quick second to repost an “Axe the Tax, Build the Homes, Fix the Budget, Stop the Crime” tweet on X. “It makes no sense. Luckily we up here in Canada have more common sense. Pierre says so.”
“When Poilievre becomes Prime Minister next year, he’s gonna stand up to Trump. They’re so different in ways that I can’t even describe. Don’t even ask me what those ways are. Just trust me, bro. He’ll bring Canada home again.”
It’s fucking ridiculous that the only party with significant seats that doesn’t want to expand the tarsands also want to break up the country. Maybe Canada is too stupid to exist.
Canada is very much a collection of separate interests that banded together for pragmatic reasons. All this nationalist nonsense people espouse is entirely manufactured. The idea that there even SHOULD be a national identity is bullshit. There should absolutely be a way for groups to leave again when it is no longer in their pragmatic interest to stay.
I mean, Quebec doesn’t evenn really want to leave. Legault has found a winning strategy that will keep his party in power for decades: Never hold a referendum, but leverage that notwithstanding clause and general nationalist animus to take and horde as much power in this province as possible forever. That way everything that goes wrong is because of the feds, and everything that goes right is because of the glorious CAQ.
Have you seen Legault’s numbers? 😂 His party is getting wiped out of Quebec come next election and the PQ will be reborn unless the Liberals elect the Messiah as their leader!
