exactly. empathy is the ability to realize other people have different experiences than you. to think about what it’s actaully like to be homeless.
but people think it means ‘just agree with me and make me feel good, and if i feel bad for people i am a good person’
Most people I know lack empathy for things like this. Even people I’ve grown up with my whole life.
So that raises the question, is it something you’re inherently born with? As I don’t think I chose to be this way, but here we are. I find it interesting to think about.
Empathy is definitely a learned trait that develops slowly. Children generally start off treating life as if it has a preset plot and other people as sort of NPCs or characters in their life. Realising other people and even animals experience things at all should happen at some point. And realising their experiences are different again later. But it’s a complicated process and may even fail.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/smart-parenting-smarter-kids/201905/how-children-develop-empathy looked pretty good from a quick search. Otherwise that’s just my memory from basic psychology classes.