âAct like youâve been there beforeâ is a clichĂ© Iâve heard that means to behave in a situation that is new and exciting to you as if it is something old and familiar to you instead.
As a closeted transfeminine person, Iâm thinking about painting my fingernails black - wearing coloured polish in public would be a first for me. And Iâm thinking of getting them done at a salon - another first.
Iâm so nervous but excited. I know from experience of rocking neutral or clear polish as a cis-looking AMAB person that being super nonchalant about having painted nails in public will lead to me having a better time, which is ironic because rocking painted fingernails in public is like bucket list-level excitement for me. But to assuage my high levels of social anxiety and increase my odds of having a good time, I know I ought to be nonchalant or âact like Iâve been there before.â Itâs kind of humorous to me, even though I obviously donât think there should be any stigma at all.
The more I dwell on this, the more I realize itâs important to me and I should do it. Gotta gather my courage tho! đ
Good advice.
Painting my nails was the first remotely fem-presenting thing I did (other than shaving!). Very few people even noticed. One of the people I work with, after I came out, said I just looked a bit more stylish than usual. The biggest response I got was paying at my local where the owner knows me well â âoh, youâve painted your nailsâ / âyupâ. And that was it.
Having said that, I donât have nearly enough courage to go to a salon or anything yet! Let us know how it goes!
Thanks for sharing! And that is top-tier pub banter! :P
I should follow your example and keep responses simple - I donât need/want to blab. Maybe just âyupâ and a smile, like âIâm doing me, and I hope youâre doing you!â
Thank you for the encouragement! I hope to be back to provide an update :)
Yeah, not talking too much is often a good plan if you want to keep things simple :)
Plus, stuff like nail art of course isnât exclusively feminine. If I go out with (very) light makeup, in womenâs jeans and painted nails, internally Iâll be overflowing with girl stuff euphoria, but to everyone else Iâm just some dude. Since my body shape, face and hair arenât remotely feminine (yet!), thereâs not really much to code âwomanâ. I think Iâd have to wear a dress and full-on eyeliner for anyone to notice.
Good advice. And maybe I overestimate how many people do/will notice. I guess I do tend to focus on the majority who do notice and not appreciate the majority who donât or are chill.
Iâm glad to hear of your times overflowing with girl stuff euphoria. And that âyetâ sounds exciting âșïž
