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124 points
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Conspiracy theorists are not about the actual theories. They are about being special. They are smart and figured out monkeys have been influencing the course of human politics since the roman empire. *They * are the only ones who “get it” that bic biro pens have finger print scanners the CIA uses to locate disobedient citizens.

As soon as it becomes confirmed, they are no longer special, because everyone “gets it”.

When they say “wake up sheeple”, they wouldn’t know what to do if you “woke up”.

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55 points

That’s why the idea of wokeism is so repugnant to right-wing conspiracy theorists. The idea that they are the ones asleep but also there are many others who woke up before them is so counter to their own self-image that they will alter their perception of the world before they will allow such a thing to be true.

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