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27 points

You can have cold drinks, just don’t buy these products to cool them.

I’ve got a cooler and an ice pack, cost $5 from a thrift store and keeps my shit cold for a whole day

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-7 points

Why do you want cold shit?

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16 points

It’s for when someone walks in thinking they’re all hot shit. You give them the cold shit to bring them to room-temperature shit.

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5 points

Do you know what a shit barometer is, boy? Measures the Shit Pressure in the air. When the Barometer rises, and you’ll feel it too, your ears will implode with the Shit Pressure. I tried to warn you, Bubs, but you picked the wrong side! Beware, the Shit Winds are a-comin!

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4 points

Just because you want it to be hot back there doesn’t mean we all do.

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3 points

Stinks less.

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2 points

You put it in a tube sock cold. You can whip it through a window, and then it will slowly warm up throughout the day and smell fucking awful. Do this to people you hate while they’re at work.

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